


let me roll it to you

by woodchoc_magnum



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bisexual Evan "Buck" Buckley, Christopher Diaz is a National Treasure, Communication is important in healthy relationships guys, Enormous Dork Eddie Diaz, Evan "Buck" Buckley and Eddie Diaz Being Idiots, Flirty Confident Evan Buckley, Idiots in Love, Jealous Eddie Diaz, M/M, Mutual Pining, Oblivious Evan "Buck" Buckley, Worried Firefam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2020-08-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:34:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 22,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25877530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/woodchoc_magnum/pseuds/woodchoc_magnum
Summary: In which Eddie starts dating Ana and Buck starts dating around; Eddie does not cope that well with change, Buck is oblivious and everyone else thinks they're a pair of idiots.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 165
Kudos: 1008





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I know it says "angst" in the tags, but honestly this is not meant to crush your spirit and break you - they're just dumb oblivious morons, that's all. Angst with a happy ending! No sad endings for me; sad endings are the worst. If you're reading one of my fics you can be guaranteed a happy ending. 👍
> 
> Thank you to SevenSoulMates for her hand-holding and unwavering support!
> 
> And thank you to [Ro_Nordmann](https://ronordmann.tumblr.com/) for the awesome cover art! 💖

Cover by [Ronordmann ❤](https://ronordmann.tumblr.com/)

* * *

* * *

So here's the thing.

Buck doesn't _care_ who Eddie dates, like, not at all.

He is unbothered by it. Eddie's a grown man and if he wants to date Christopher's teacher – which Buck thinks is weird, but anyway – then he's more than allowed to do that.

The fact that everyone looked at him peculiarly after Eddie casually dropped into the conversation that he and Ana were seeing each other was kind of insulting, because why would he even care? He doesn't care. Eddie can do whatever he wants.

Buck certainly wasn't going to say out loud that he thought dating one of Christopher's current teachers was deeply uncool, and what if they broke up and it was suddenly awkward for Christopher – no, he was going to keep those thoughts to himself. He was sure she was a nice person, but… it seemed kind of selfish, to him. Not that he'd ever say that to Eddie, who was particularly tight-lipped about the whole thing.

And was his first instinct to sign up to Tinder and then Grindr as well? Maybe.

~~

"What's going on with you?" Maddie asked him. She was heavily pregnant; sitting in a recliner at her and Chimney's new house with a bowl of ice cream balanced on her belly. He admired that skill.

"Nothing?" he asked, stretching his legs out onto the coffee table. "Everything's fine with me."

She gave him a knowing look. "Chim says that Eddie's got a girlfriend."

"So?"

"So we thought you… might have some feelings about that."

"Nope." Buck took a swig of beer, eyeing her stomach. "At what point did you realise you could balance things on it?"

Maddie looked down at herself and laughed. "Um, around the six-month mark, I guess?"

"It's very impressive."

"Well, you keep drinking that beer and you could end up with a belly like this all of your very own."

He patted his flat stomach and said, "Not the way I work out."

"Right." Maddie had a spoonful of ice cream, studying him again. "So you're cool with it."

"With Eddie? Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" he asked quizzically.

She sighed. "I don't know, the fact that you guys are – were – together all the time; that you sleep over at his house constantly, that you pick up Christopher from school sometimes… you're kind of co-parenting that kid together and now he's… moved on?"

He shrugged. "I knew it would happen. It's fine. Eddie and I are rock solid."

"If you wanted to tell me that you're not happy about it, you can," she said gently. "Chim's not here and I won't say anything to him."

Buck met her eyes and said, "Honestly, Maddie. I'm fine."

~~

He was not fine.

He'd usually go over to Eddie's house and let himself in whenever he wanted, but now that Eddie had a girlfriend, he felt weird about doing that. Instead he left Maddie's and went to a bar, where a very nice girl named Sarah took pity on him – they danced for a few hours, made out in a booth in the back and he went home with her.

It was the first time he'd slept with anyone since Ali, and honestly, it felt good to get a little loose again. Some no-strings-attached sex was just what he needed to break out of his funk, and she even gave him her number. He guessed he'd shown her a good time.

He pulled into the gym parking lot in his usual space alongside Eddie's truck and hopped out, an extra spring in his step. Eddie was leaning against the tray of his truck on his phone, and he glanced over at Buck with a smile. "Morning," he said, raising his eyebrows. "You look happy."

He just shrugged and said, "I had a good work-out." A _very_ good work-out.

"So you're not up for a little sparring this morning?" Eddie asked him. They'd been getting together once a week before work to do a little light boxing together – well, when Eddie wasn't trying to kill him with one of his roundhouse kicks – and Buck usually spent all week looking forward to it.

Eddie was never hotter than when he was wearing boxing gloves in one of those gaping singlets he loved so much, dripping with sweat - not that Buck would ever say that aloud to anyone.

"Yeah, I'm up for it," he said easily, slinging his bag over his shoulder. "How's Chris?"

"He was wondering where you were last night," Eddie said, leading him into the gym. "I thought you might've come over."

"Oh, sorry. I had dinner with Maddie and Chim; I should've messaged you." Why was he apologising? Eddie had a girlfriend; Buck wasn't going to just randomly turn up anymore.

"How's Maddie going? She's got what, two months left?" Eddie held the door open for him, and as Buck brushed past him, he caught a whiff of his deodorant. Sandalwood and something else, he wasn't sure. Eddie always smelled damn good.

"Yeah, about that. The doctor told her she's got to stay off her feet as much as possible, so if you've noticed Chim slowly losing his mind, that's why."

They signed in and went into the locker rooms to change. Buck stripped out of his shirt, totally forgetting the hickey above his nipple, and it was only when Eddie gave him a concerned look that he remembered. "What's that?" Eddie asked, his eyebrows lifting a bit.

"Oh, I met a girl last night." Buck pulled a tank top on.

Eddie was still staring at him, puzzled. "You… told me you went to Maddie's?"

"Yeah, I went out after." Buck glanced at him. "That okay?"

"Uh, yeah. Fine." Eddie made a face, shrugging out of his shirt and pulling on a black singlet. "So you're dating again."

"Yep."

"Just… the one girl, or…"

"I don't know, I signed up to a couple of apps." Buck changed into his sweats and then began to tape up his right hand and wrist; the one that always gave him trouble, especially if Eddie got a little carried away in the ring.

Eddie eyed him and said, "Let me do that. Here, give me your hand."

Buck handed him the tape and obediently held his hand out. Eddie wound it around his wrist and then up and over his thumb, criss-crossing his palm. "Thanks," Buck said when he was done, flexing his hand. "It's easier when you do it."

"No problem." Eddie handed the tape back, closing his locker door. "All right, let's do this."

~~

They spent about forty minutes in the ring – more serious bouts were punctuated with laughter, and Buck let Eddie win a couple of rounds, just because. He even managed to dodge one of those lethal kicks, but when he attempted one of his own and ended up flat on his back, Eddie laughed so hard he ended up on his knees, clutching his stomach.

It was when Buck was leaving the showers, a towel around his waist, that Eddie asked curiously, "Why didn't you tell me you were going to start dating again?"

He wanted to say, 'Why didn't you tell _me_ you were going to pick up that teacher?' but instead he replied, "I just kinda decided on a whim."

"It's been a while," Eddie commented.

"I guess. I don't know." Buck towelled himself off at his locker, his back to Eddie. "You didn't tell me about Ana."

"That's different."

"How, exactly?"

Eddie was silent, and then mumbled, "It just is."

_You can't have your cake and eat it too_ , Buck thought as he pulled his jeans on. When he turned around, his t-shirt in his hands, he found Eddie's eyes on him. "What?"

"You have scratch marks on your back," he said tightly.

"Oh. Well, she had long nails." Buck turned away again, trying not to smirk. Eddie looked so damn _rattled_ – he had no idea what that was about, but he found it amusing.

They were walking out to their cars when Eddie murmured, "You don't want to get too carried away, you know?"

Buck glanced at him, his keys in his hand. "With what?"

"Sleeping around again." Eddie kept his eyes averted. "Everyone's told me all about Buck 1.0. I don't think Buck 1.0 and I would've been friends."

He stopped, hitching his bag on his shoulder. "So you're saying that if I keep sleeping around we're not going to be friends anymore?"

"No—"

"That's kinda what you said." Buck looked around the car park to ensure they were alone and said, "Eddie, I'm a grown man. Just because I haven't dated anyone in a year doesn't mean I haven't wanted to."

"Then why didn't you?" Eddie asked uncertainly.

"Because I was trying to figure my shit out, you know? I was really unhappy, and I thought adding sex to the mix would be like, extra self-destructive, or something," he said. "But now, I don't know, I feel good again. You've got a girlfriend, so you don't need me as much—"

"Who said I didn't need you as much?" Eddie demanded. "That doesn't have to change."

He paused, and said, "What are you going to tell her? This is my friend Buck, and he has no life so he's over at my house all the time with me and my kid? You don't need me anymore."

"I never said I didn't need you," Eddie complained. "You're projecting. You don't like Ana."

"First of all, I've never met her—"

"No, that's what this is. You don't like her." Eddie's lips pulled tight. "That's fine. I'll see you at work." He stomped over to his car, yanking his keys out of his pocket.

"Jesus Christ, Eddie, that's not what I said," Buck called after him, holding his arms out helplessly. "What's gotten into you?"

"Nothing," Eddie practically snarled, sliding into the driver's side, and slamming the door shut.

Buck watched him pull out of the lot and drive away, shaking his head. "Fucking ridiculous," he muttered, and climbed into his car. He sat for a minute, and then called Eddie through Bluetooth, putting his car in reverse.

"God, Buck, what?" Eddie answered, his tone clipped. "I'll see you in like five minutes."

"I'm not letting you run away from this," Buck replied. He backed out of his spot and headed out of the lot as well. Eddie's truck was stopped at the lights in the distance. "What are you so pissed about, anyway? How can I like or not like someone I've never met?"

Eddie was silent for so long that Buck checked to make sure the call was still connected. "You were supposed to come over last night," he finally said. "Christopher expected you to."

"I should've told you at work that I was going to Maddie's, but I forgot – I don't always come over on a Tuesday?" Buck pulled to a stop behind him at the lights, drumming his fingers on the edge of the window.

There was silence again.

Buck said, "Is something else going on, dude? You didn't break up, did you?"

"No."

"Then…?"

"Nothing. Sorry. I don't know."

The light turned green, and Buck followed Eddie through the intersection. "I could come over tonight," Buck offered. "I could make you guys dinner."

Eddie paused again, and then said, "I'm meant to be seeing her tonight."

"Oh, okay. That's fine. Who's looking after Chris? I could babysit him if you want?"

"I don't want you to have babysit my kid just because I'm dating," Eddie complained.

Buck rolled his eyes. "I don't know Eddie, what do you fucking want? I won't offer; you just tell me what you want."

"I don't want things to change and I don't want you to think that you have to babysit Chris because I've got a date."

"Okay. I won't babysit Chris."

There was another silence, and then Eddie's unhappy voice came through. "But what are you going to do?"

"I don't know, I've got a couple of messages on Tinder—"

"Oh, for fuck's sake," Eddie snapped, and ended the call.

They stopped at another light, and Buck held up his arms pointedly – Eddie glanced at him in the rear-view mirror, and Buck saw him throw his head back against the seat.

Buck sent him a text. _You're acting like a dick, wtf is going on?_

Eddie didn't reply, and it wasn't until they pulled up together and parked side-by-side at the station, that he looked over at Buck grumpily and said, "Nothing's going on."

Buck just shook his head, not wanting to get into it again. "Whatever," he said, striding over to the station. "You just let me know when you've finished this little snit of yours."

"It's not a snit," Eddie snapped, but Buck just shrugged at him and went into the locker room. Chimney was seated on the bench, tying up his shoes.

"Morning boys," he greeted them. "Ready for another fun-filled day?"

Eddie ignored him, yanking open his lock in agitation. Buck made a face at him, rolling his eyes, and then smiled at Chimney. "Oh yeah, it's going to be _great._ "

~~

"So…" Hen sidled up to Buck as he ripped his gloves off, waiting for Bobby and Eddie to finish putting their equipment away. "What's wrong with Eddie?"

Buck sighed, raising his eyebrows at her. "Honestly? He's been acting like a dick to me all day."

"What'd you do?"

"First of all, I've done nothing, Hen. I'm an angel. You know this."

She grinned at him, leaning against the truck. "Right. So, what'd you do?"

Buck shrugged. "Beats me. He's all bent out of shape because I hooked up with a girl last night. I don't understand what the problem is."

Hen looked over at Eddie, trying and failing to keep the smile from her face. "Oh, you did, huh?"

"Yeah. Why would he even care?" Buck folded his arms across his chest, lounging beside her. Bobby was talking to Eddie, who still – even after four hours – looked pissed off.

"Possibly because he's used to having a monopoly on your time and he might not like the fact that you may be slightly more unavailable if you're dating someone," she said delicately. "Perhaps?"

"It was one girl," he complained. "Eddie's been dating Ana for weeks."

"Yeah, but that's not going to go anywhere," she predicted. "He doesn't really like her."

"What makes you say that?"

She shrugged. "I just… know. He never talks about her; if we try to ask him what's going on, he clams up about it… so I think it's going to fizzle."

"He's just private."

"Maybe, but I don't think so. When Karen and I first started dating, I couldn't stop talking about her or thinking about her, wanting to text her and call her…" she trailed off. "When you meet that special person, you want to be together all the time. Ana asks him out on a date, and he hesitates about it, every single time. He's not into it."

"He's got Christopher to think about," Buck replied, as Bobby and Eddie headed over towards them.

"Are you two planning on doing any work today?" Bobby called to them as he removed his helmet. "Where's Chim?"

"He's around the other side," Hen replied, "talking to Maddie on the phone for the fifteenth time today."

Bobby checked his watch. "I think we're done here," he said, casting a look over at the tow trucks. "We'll head back for some lunch. Buck, you're driving."

"Sweet," Buck said, trying to catch Eddie's eyes, but he was focused on removing his gloves.

Buck pulled himself up into the driver's seat of the truck and waited until everyone was strapped in, before pulling away. Through the headset he heard Hen say to Eddie, "How's everything going with Ana?"

Buck rolled his eyes, ignoring the questioning look Bobby gave him.

Eddie's voice came through. "It's fine."

"You guys been going out a lot?"

"Kinda hard when you're a single dad."

Buck made a face at that, shaking his head. "I offered to babysit for you," he said, unable to help himself.

"I'm fine," Eddie snapped back.

At that Bobby looked over at him again, his eyebrows knitted together in confusion. "Everything okay, Eddie?"

"Yes, Cap. I'm fine."

Buck glanced over at Bobby with raised eyebrows and said, "He's lying."

"Shut up!"

~~

As soon as they arrived back at the station, and because he couldn't handle having another confrontation with Eddie, the grumpiest man in the history of the world, Buck offered to do a coffee run. He was instantly swamped with orders, jotting them all down, ignoring Eddie glowering at him from the locker room.

And then he took off down the street and to the coffee shop, where he placed their order and took a seat at a table, whipping his phone out.

Eddie had sent him a text. _I'm not mad at you._

Buck sighed. They were going to continue this through text? Fucking hell. He thought for a moment, and then sent back, _If you are, I don't know wtf for._

Three dots popped up and disappeared again. Buck looked around the café while he waited and couldn't help but notice that an extremely good-looking man in a dress shirt and pants was smiling at him from across the room. Eddie was almost instantly forgotten. He smiled back, setting his phone down on the table, arching his eyebrows, and the man stood up and walked right over to him.

"Hi," he said, sliding into the vacant seat across from Buck. "I'm Aras."

"Evan Buckley, but everyone calls me Buck," he replied, holding his hand out so they could shake. "Nice to meet you."

Aras had olive skin, with dark curly hair and the beginnings of a thick – but well-groomed – beard. "You a firefighter, Buck?"

He looked down at his uniform. "What tipped you off?"

"Gee, let me think," he replied with a chuckle. "The hair, definitely the hair."

Buck patted his head. "The dead giveaway. And you?"

"I'm a graphic designer, currently unemployed but hopefully not for much longer – I just had a job interview that went pretty well," he replied, and crossed his fingers. "So we'll see."

"Well, good luck, I hope you get some good news."

Aras looked him up and down, arching an eyebrow. Buck was very familiar with that look – it'd been a while since he'd been with a guy, but the idea of it filled his stomach with warmth. "And you're… on a lunch break?"

"Uh no, just grabbing coffees for everyone, if you're wondering what the hold-up is," Buck replied with a grin. "I've got to head back in a minute."

"Well, maybe you'd be interested in meeting up for a drink after work? I know a nice bar in the city," he said. "Are you free tonight?"

"Definitely," Buck agreed. "Let me give you my number."

~~

He returned to the station with a spring in his step and passed out the coffees to everyone before striding upstairs. Eddie was in one of the armchairs on his phone, scowl still firmly in place. Bobby and Chimney were arguing in the kitchen, and Hen was at the table, poring over a medical textbook.

Medicine was boring, so Buck decided to take his chances with Eddie, and dropped into the seat across from him, reaching out to tap his leg with his foot. Eddie glanced up at him briefly and murmured, "You didn't reply."

Buck sipped his latte and reached for his phone. He'd clicked out of messages to take down Aras's phone number, and sure enough, he had a message notification from Eddie.

_I just don't like change, thought that you wouldn't pull away if I started seeing someone. And Christopher isn't happy._

Buck glanced at him and typed quickly - _With you dating his teacher?_

Eddie read the message and frowned deeply. The reply popped up a second later. _Yeah, he hates it. I feel like shit._

_Do you like her?_

_Yes?_

_Then you'll have to decide what you're going to do, if it's worth it or not. It's Chris - he'll come around._

Eddie's eyes flicked to him. _He just wants you over all the time._

Buck shrugged at him and replied, _I mean, maybe I've been around too much and it's confusing, I don't know._

_You don't want to spend time with us anymore?_

He made sure Eddie was looking at him and shook his head firmly, and replied - _This was always going to happen – you were going to meet someone and so was I._

Eddie grimaced at that, and replied - _No offence, but you haven't met anyone._

_Yet. Also, offence taken._

They looked at each other again. Eddie held his hand out, and Buck passed his coffee across automatically. Eddie took a sip, sitting up, set the cup between his legs and replied - _I'm scared that Buck 1.0 is going to make an appearance._

Buck frowned. _Buck 1.0 was a great guy, but he just liked sex a little too much. Nothing is going to change. It's you and me, we're rock solid. Always._

Eddie met his eyes and nodded again.

"What the fuck are you two doing?" Chimney called from the kitchen, shattering the silence. "Are you telepathic? I'm watching you have a silent conversation over there and it's freaking me out!"

~~

"So what are you doing tonight?" Eddie asked as they went out to their cars at the end of their shift.

Buck said, "I'm meeting a guy for a drink."

Eddie stopped in his tracks, turning to him incredulously. "But—"

"What?"

"You said… you had no plans," Eddie replied, blinking rapidly at him. "A guy?"

"Yeah, I met him at the coffee shop this afternoon," Buck replied easily.

"A guy."

"Yep."

Eddie blinked rapidly, shaking his head. "A guy?!"

"Yes?"

"You're dating guys and girls." Eddie stared at the ground, chewing his lower lip. "I can't… Buck, why… don't – you don't have to do this because you're scared of losing me or anything, like—"

"This isn't because of you. Well, it is, because… I can't just hang around you and Christopher forever, you know? I've got to start putting myself out there again. You've moved on from Shannon and I feel good again, I mean, I'm feeling really confident, you know? So I'm just going to see what happens." Buck smiled at him, but Eddie merely gave him a confused, unhappy look in return. "What are you so worried about?"

He grimaced. "This is really sudden."

_Well, you dating Ana was kind of sudden too,_ Buck thought, but wisely kept his mouth shut. "I just made the decision to get back out there. That's all."

Eddie nodded pensively, rubbing his lips with his hand. "But you'll come over to our house tomorrow night for a movie and pizza," he said, raising his eyebrows hopefully. "Just the three of us?"

"Sure. Sounds great."

Some of the tension left Eddie's face. "Good."

Buck started to his car. "See you tomorrow."

"Hey, you want to hit the gym again before work? Just… it's a good workout, you know?" Eddie asked hesitantly.

Buck nodded at him. "Sure."

"Okay. Great." Eddie looked relieved, flashing him a smile. "See you in the morning."

~~

When Buck arrived at the bar of Aras's choice – a trendy place downtown – he found him perched on a stool, dressed in black slacks and a patterned button-up. When Buck sat down beside him, he realised there were parrots all over the shirt, and chuckled at it.

Aras glanced down at himself with a grin. "Never met a pattern I didn't like. Drink? Beer, whiskey, cocktail—"

"I'll take a beer, thanks," Buck replied. He was wearing his nicest blue button-up and a pair of tan slacks. Eddie had been with him when he'd bought the shirt; he'd said it brought out his eyes. From the way Aras was smiling at him, he guessed Eddie was right.

They chatted for a while, the obligatory 'getting-to-know-you' conversation – Aras was 30, he'd only been in LA for a few months, he'd moved out for work but the company had shut down, and now he was trying to find something else. His family was from Greece, but he was first generation American, though he was back and forth from Greece all the time to see his relatives. He played basketball socially and was trying to learn how to surf. He'd been in a long-term relationship for three years before he'd moved to LA, and now he was single again, dating casually.

He'd looked a bit surprised when Buck mentioned how long he'd been single, and it was a hard thing to explain – "Well, the woman I was seeing left the country and ghosted me, and the girl I dated after her freaked out when I was in a truck bombing and nearly lost my leg, so since then I've just been single and spending all my time with my best friend and his kid."

They were in a booth by then, sharing a tapas plate of tiny food. Aras raised an eyebrow at him and said, "And how does your best friend feel about you putting yourself back out there?"

Buck shrugged. "Honestly, he's being a dick about it, but he's got a girlfriend, so… I don't know what his problem is. He'll get over it; he always does."

"And he obviously knows that you're… gay?"

"I'm bi. Um, actually, I don't think I mentioned that to him before today…" he trailed off. "Shit. I forgot to come out to him."

Aras laughed. "And he's your best friend?"

"Oh yeah, the best guy I know." Buck wanted to show him a picture of Eddie and Christopher but decided that was a little weird. "We've been working together for a couple of years now."

"No romance there, huh?"

He shook his head. "Nah. Eddie's straight. I think he's just worried that things will change, you know? Because I'm always available to come over and keep them company, or baby-sit, stuff like that, but… I feel like it's time to get out there again, so… that's what I'm doing."

"All to my benefit," Aras said, winking at him. "So tell me some firefighter stories."

Buck had _plenty_ of those. He told him all about the earthquake and how he and Eddie had fought their way through a toppled building to save people; about how the 118 were on first on the scene for the plane crash a few years ago; how he and Eddie had scaled the cliff once to rescue the hiker who'd gone over the side; how he and Eddie had surfed the fire truck to rescue the skydiver and a few other heroic things they'd done, here and there. He didn't mention the tsunami.

"Wow, you and Eddie are certainly quite the team," Aras said, smiling at him knowingly. "Must be nice to have someone you can count on."

"Yeah, it's the best." Buck downed the last of his beer.

"And he's seeing someone."

"A teacher from his kid's school," he replied, and made a face. "I think it's weird."

"Why?"

"What if they break-up, and then Christopher has to be in class with his dad's ex-girlfriend?"

Aras grimaced. "Oh yeah, that's… awkward."

"Right? But anyway, it's none of my business."

"Maybe it'll all work out and they'll get married," Aras suggested.

Buck, who knew Eddie better than anyone, was sure it wouldn't work out, but how could he explain that to someone who had no knowledge of the situation? He simply shrugged and said, "Guess we'll have to see."

~~

They parted with a kiss at the end of the date, in an alley off from the main road. Aras tasted, smelled, and looked great, and Buck was agreeing to a second date on the weekend almost instantly.

He was still feeling great about it early the next morning when he pulled in beside Eddie at the gym and hopped out of the car. "Morning!"

Eddie gave him a disgruntled look, dark circles under his eyes. "Morning. God, you didn't get laid again, did you?"

Buck rolled his eyes. "Not that it's any of your business, but no, I didn't. What's wrong with you?"

"I didn't sleep well." Eddie trudged over to the entrance, tugging the doors open. "You're still coming over tonight, right?"

"Yep."

Buck followed him into the locker rooms and changed into his workout gear. Eddie was quieter than usual, but when Buck held the tape out to him, he took it and carefully wrapped Buck's right hand up. "Still bothering you?"

"Yeah, my wrist, mostly."

"Maybe you need to get it checked out."

"Maybe." Buck slipped into his gloves and smiled at Eddie. "Ready to go?"

Eddie nodded, and they went out to one of the boxing rings. Buck hopped around, tilting his head side to side to stretch out his neck, and waited while Eddie stretched – and then they were into it, trading punches and ducking and diving. Buck landed a blow to Eddie's side, and Eddie quickly countered with one of his own, but Buck danced away with a laugh. Eddie groaned at him, holding his fists up. "Come on," he groaned. "Stop teasing."

"You love it." Feeling extra cocky, Buck darted back over to him and it started up again, until Eddie had him up against the ropes. Buck pushed him away, wiping the sweat from his brow, watching as Eddie rolled his shoulders. "What's up with you?" he asked. "You're still pissed off?"

"No." Eddie looked over at him, sweat dripping down his face.

"Is this because I didn't tell you I was bi?" Buck stepped over to him again, raising his fists.

Eddie said with a shrug, "I figured you were."

"How?"

He grinned. "I've seen you checking out guys."

"You have?" Buck was surprised. "I thought I was being more subtle."

"Nah." Eddie paused, and then said, "I've seen you looking at me, a couple of times."

"Well, can you blame me?"

Eddie looked down at himself and shrugged again. "Guess not."

"Doesn't mean anything, though," Buck replied. "You're nice to look at."

"If you're trying to get me to go easier on you, it's not working," Eddie replied, but he was smirking, looking more cheerful than he had in the last two days.

"Nah, I know flattery doesn't work on you," Buck said. "Come on, Diaz. Show me what you got."

~~

The day passed by uneventfully – one of those slow days at the firehouse, where Cap put everyone to work doing chores rather than sitting around goofing off. Buck texted Aras on and off, making plans for Saturday night, flirting a bit – he was pleased that after a year on the bench, he still had the moves.

He left his car at the station and went home with Eddie, annoying him by changing the radio station and any other dials, just for fun, just to make Eddie swear at him and slap his hands away in exasperation. Just for a reaction – to get Eddie to give him that frustrated-yet-amused smile of his, the one where he was trying not to laugh but failing.

Buck knew Eddie like the back of his hand; knew how to make him tick; knew exactly what to do to get him to laugh, and by the time they arrived at his house, he was back to his old self again, teasing Buck as they headed inside. Carla greeted them both, but Buck was immediately monopolised by Christopher, who dragged him down the hallway to his bedroom to show him a new Lego set.

Buck sat on the floor with him and studied the box – it was a castle complete with a prince, princess, knights and a king and queen. Christopher said, "Buck, it's too hard," and made a face at him, and Buck had to agree that it looked a little complicated, but he was sure they could figure it out.

"Your grandparents get you this one?" he asked.

"Yeah, it's an early birthday present." Christopher was lying on his stomach on the floor, playing with the knights. "Do you like it?"

"Yeah, it's super cool. We can build it together."

Eddie appeared in the doorway, folding his arms across his chest. "You guys want pizza for dinner?"

"Yes!" Christopher cheered. "Dad, can we have pepperoni?"

"Sure. Buck?"

"Ah, supreme for me, thanks Eds." Buck flashed him a smile. "You want to come in and help us?"

"I will in a bit. I've just got to return a call." Eddie waved at them and left the doorway.

Buck turned back to Christopher, who was scowling. "What's up?" he asked, dropping his voice low. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

Buck shifted so he was lying on the floor as well, his legs stretched out. "You can talk to me."

Christopher stuck his lower lip out and murmured, "I don't like her."

"Who? Ana?"

"Ms Flores," Christopher corrected, reaching under the bed, and dragging out a box of Duplo. "Look what she gave me, Buck."

Buck winced. Christopher was turning ten, and for him to receive a box of Duplo was a slap in the face. It was Lego or nothing. "She's just trying to be nice," he said delicately. "She likes you."

"No, she doesn't. She likes Dad." Christopher was scowling again, sticking pieces of Lego together. "I saw them kissing."

Buck made a face. "Gross."

"Yeah, gross."

"I don't know buddy, your dad hasn't dated anyone in a long time, and—"

"I don't want him to date _anyone._ Ever." Christopher gave Buck a fierce look – well, as fierce as he could manage. "I don't like it."

It wasn't like Christopher to be so possessive of Eddie – out of character, Buck thought, figuring that something else was going on. "Have you talked to your dad about this?"

"No."

"I think you guys might need to talk it out."

"No, 'cause if I tell him, he'll be mad at me."

"Your dad would never be mad at you," Buck said gently. "You've got the best dad in the world."

"No." Christopher's lower lip was sticking out. "I hate it."

Concerned, Buck sat up, reaching out to ruffle his hair. "What else is going on, bud?"

"You haven't been over!" he exploded, and then pressed his hands to his face.

_Fuck._ Guilty as all hell, Buck murmured, "I'm so sorry, buddy. I've just been a bit busy."

"Busy with what?"

"My sister's pregnant – you remember Maddie? So I've been spending some time with her before the baby comes. That's all, bud. I'm here now and I'm staying the night." Buck realised Eddie was standing near the doorway, in a spot where Christopher couldn't see him, listening intently.

"So you haven't replaced us?"

"No, not at all, kiddo," Buck said, pushing the Lego aside to scoop Christopher up into a hug. Christopher squirmed a bit but finally relented, giggling when Buck smacked a kiss to his cheek. "You're my best friend! You can't get rid of me that easily."

"You promise?"

"Yeah, I promise."

~~

They ate pizza and watched a movie – the original _Lion King_. Eddie had hated the remake and refused to entertain the thought of ever watching it again, despite the fact that both Buck and Christopher had enjoyed it (though Buck admitted the original animated version was better). That led to some arguing about which version to watch, with Eddie finally winning by simply selecting the animated version and refusing to budge.

Afterwards, as Eddie tucked Christopher into bed and read to him for a while, Buck showered and sprawled out on the lounge with his phone, texting Aras again. He heard Eddie say goodnight to his son, and then most of the lights in the house were flicked off, except for the kitchen and the lamp in the lounge room.

Eddie padded out to join him, in his sweats and a ratty t-shirt. He gestured to the end of the couch; Buck lifted his legs obediently and Eddie sat down, examining Buck's scarred leg carefully. "Are you still having any pain?" he asked, running his finger along the scar.

"Sometimes. I did after we had to climb down that hill last week, remember? I had to ice it when I got home." Buck sent a goodnight text to Aras and switched his phone off, watching as Eddie began to massage his leg gently.

He often wondered what Hen or Chimney would say if they walked in on them like this – it was usually how they ended the night, with Eddie giving him a leg massage. It had been that way ever since the truck bombing.

He closed his eyes, yawning as Eddie's fingers worked the muscles in his leg. They were both silent, Buck nearly drifting off to sleep, when he was startled awake with, "I knew Chris wasn't happy."

Buck lifted his head and looked down at him.

Eddie's voice was low, his expression dark. "He hasn't been happy at all. He's been throwing tantrums. When I told him that you weren't coming over last night, and that Abuela was going to babysit while I went on a date, he actually shouted at me and then started crying."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because… what am I going to say, that I can't control my kid? That my kid hates my girlfriend? I keep hoping that he'll… get over it, but any time I mention Ana, he brings you up instead." Eddie slid his hands up and down Buck's leg and then resumed massaging. "He told me that he hates her. He never hated her when she was just his teacher."

Buck didn't want to point out that maybe the fact that she was his teacher was one of the main problems, so instead he said, "This is what I was saying, about… me being here too much. It's causing problems."

Eddie said quietly, "I want you here."

"Yeah, but… we're never going to move on."

"I don't want to move on."

Confused, Buck said, "Eddie, you've got a girlfriend."

He nodded slowly. "I know."

"And I'm dating, so… we can't be in each other's pockets anymore, right?"

Eddie's lips turned down at the corners. He swallowed hard and said, "I don't like it when Chris is upset."

"I know, but… I'm not going anywhere; I'm always going to be in your life. I'll be here whenever you want."

Eddie gave him a sidelong look. There was something Buck didn't recognise in his eyes – something different. He said, "You can still come over unannounced."

"I didn't want to make you uncomfortable—"

"She's never been here, Buck. We're just going out on dates, it's… we haven't even labelled it yet. We've kissed a couple of times; that's it. Honestly… I don't really feel a spark."

"Then…"

"Because I have to try, don't I? Everyone keeps telling me to date, to put myself out there… and she's nice, and sweet…" he trailed off. "I just don't think she gets me. Everything is easier when you're here. Honestly, I'd rather just spend time with you."

"That's sweet, but unfortunately, I'm not a chick."

Eddie frowned. "No."

"And you're not gay."

"No," he said again, a little quieter. He stroked his hands up and down Buck's leg again, a deeply unhappy expression on his face. "That guy you're seeing… are you going out again?"

Buck nodded. "On Saturday."

"What's his name?"

"Aras. He's a graphic designer."

"And you just… met him at the coffee shop. How many other people have you noticed checking you out in the last few years and did nothing about it?"

Buck shrugged. "Probably the same amount as you – you never pay any attention to it, either."

"Yeah, but it's different for me." Eddie glanced at him. "Why now, though?"

"I don't know. I've been lonely, I guess."

"But you have us."

"Yeah, and you know I love you guys—"

"But we're not enough?" Eddie's voice was low.

Buck frowned at him. "No, you're enough," he said gently. "But you have a girlfriend now, and she's not going to want your best friend hanging around as you two get closer, so… I'm respectfully taking a step back. I'm setting you free."

"Setting me free."

"Yeah, to find the next Mrs Diaz."

Eddie was silent again, still massaging Buck's leg methodically. There was a small part of Buck that wanted to tell him that he didn't really have to do it anymore, but he liked the closeness – liked to have Eddie take care of him, from time to time.

"Maybe if things go well, I could meet him," Eddie finally suggested. "To make sure he's good enough for you."

Buck chuckled at him. "If that makes you happy, sure."

"And you can meet Ana." Eddie's voice was hollow, like he didn't really mean it.

"Sure. Sounds good."

~~

Buck met Maddie for lunch two days later. He picked up some sandwiches for them and a four pack of cupcakes from the bakery near her house, and when he presented them to her, she exclaimed with delight.

They ate at the picnic table in the backyard. There was a tall oak tree that provided shade, and Chimney was already building a playhouse underneath it for their kid. They had a nice green lawn, surrounded by plants, and a big round wooden table with an umbrella in the centre of the back patio.

They'd covered the basics when Buck told her that he'd been on a date with a guy and had a second date lined up. Maddie's eyes lit up, her food forgotten, and demanded all the details – name, age, job, dating history, social security number, etc.

Buck filled her in as best he could, showed her Aras's Instagram, which she flicked through suspiciously before handing the phone back. Finally, after taking a huge bite of her sandwich and chewing thoughtfully, she said, "What does Eddie think?"

Buck rolled his eyes. "Honestly, I don't understand what's going on with him. He's been a real d-bag ever since I told him I was dating again. He's got a girlfriend, like, I don't get it?"

Maddie had a knowing smile on her face. "Kinda like he's jealous?"

"Jealous of what? Me?"

"No, jealous that there are now other people who will take you away from him." She arched her eyebrows. "He's had a monopoly on you for over two years now. You're at his house multiple times a week; you three are always doing stuff on the weekends or taking off together on your little adventures."

"He has a _girlfriend_."

"So? Maybe he only has a girlfriend because he's been conditioned by society to think that's what he needs," she pointed out. "Maybe he's trying to come to terms with what he actually wants instead of what he thinks he should have."

He was totally confused. "I don't understand—"

Maddie set her sandwich down on the plate and gave him a long look. "Buck, if we can all see it, how come you can't? You two have lived out of each other's pockets for over two years. You follow each other around. When we have parties, you're with Eddie and Christopher, always. It's like we all have our own little family units and you three are your own family as well. You must see it."

Of course he could see it. He felt the most comfortable with Eddie and Christopher; they'd always been a unit of three. And he really didn't want that to change, but Eddie had gone out and gotten himself a girlfriend, so what the fuck was he supposed to do? He'd been replaced.

"It doesn't matter," he said to her. "Even if I wanted something… he's straight. He's made that pretty clear. So I need to move on, don't I?"

She nodded, swallowing hard. "I guess."

"It's not like we're not going to be friends anymore. He's still my best friend in the whole world." Buck picked up his sandwich and took a bite.

"Have you ever asked him, though?" she pressed. "Sat him down and said, hey Eddie, do you think we could be more than just friends?"

He shook his head. "No way. That would ruin things."

"Or maybe—"

"This isn't a movie. You don't confess your feelings to your best friend – your straight best friend – and have him instantly say that he wants the same thing. Eddie's a complicated guy, but I know him better than anyone. If had feelings for me, I would know. We're just friends."

She frowned again, pursing her lips unhappily. "I mean, I guess… I guess you know him."

"You guess? I spend all my time with the guy."

"And it's never been anything more than just friends?"

He shook his head. "Nope. And that's all it's going to be."

~~

His second date with Aras ended with an invite back to the loft, which Aras gladly took him up on. Buck hadn't slept with a guy in a few years, but it was just like riding a bike – he enjoyed every second of it. He considered himself bisexual, but he loved sleeping with men and had _missed it_ more than he'd allowed himself to admit.

Happily, Aras was great in bed, and even took him out for breakfast the next morning. They'd finished their meals and were chatting over coffee when the door to the restaurant opened, and in walked Eddie and Ana. Buck said to Aras, "Well, you're about to meet my friend, Eddie."

That was when Eddie spotted him, his eyebrows flying up, a look of pure distress crossing his face. _Well, that's nice_ , Buck thought bitterly, rising out of his seat to wave to him. Aras gave him a concerned look and sipped his coffee.

Eddie led Ana through the tables towards them, his mouth set in a grim line. Buck smiled at him, which was enough for Eddie to relax a bit. "Hey Eds," he said easily. "What brings you to this side of town?"

"You're always raving about this place," Eddie replied, glancing at Aras briefly. "Um, Ana, this is the Buck I'm always talking about."

"Christopher's Buck," she said with a smile, holding her hand out so he could shake it. "It's so nice to meet you finally. Christopher draws you and talks about you all the time, I almost feel like we've already met."

He laughed. "That's sweet. Hey, this is Aras Hatzi. Aras, this is Eddie Diaz and Ana Flores."

She shook Aras's hand as well. "Nice to meet you."

"You're on a date," Eddie said to him, unhappiness written all over his face. "We won't impose."

Buck said, "We're just finishing up, anyway."

"The eggs Benedict are fantastic here," Aras said to Eddie, who glanced at him briefly before turning back to Buck.

Awkward as all hell, with Ana staring at Eddie worriedly and Aras with a totally confused look on his face, Buck said, "Are you working tonight, Eds?"

"Yeah, I am. You?"

"Yep. I'll see you at work then, okay? Aras and I are going to see a movie."

"Okay." Eddie flashed him a tight smile, nodded at Aras and said, "Nice to meet you," before leading Ana away.

Buck turned to Aras, who raised his eyebrows at him. "What the hell was that all about?"

~~

"I'm just gonna say it," Aras said as they were in line for the movie. "Your friend is in love with you."

Buck made a face at him. "He's not."

"I call it like I see it. He could've killed me with a look today."

"He's just…"

"Deeply closeted and unhappy."

"No, that's just Eddie. He's always been like this, when it comes to me. I don't know why." Buck checked his phone, about to switch it to silent, when a message from Eddie popped up.

_Sorry about this morning. Wasn't ready to meet him._

Buck sighed, tapping his foot. Aras gave him a questioning look and he said, "Eddie's… texting me."

Aras grinned. "He's in love with you."

"He's not," he groaned, and replied to Eddie – _It's ok, see you at work._

"Maybe we should skip the movie," Aras said, looking around the crowded cinema. "At this rate we'll miss the first ten minutes."

"Fine with me. What do you want to do instead?"

Aras gave him a _look_ , and Buck smirked. "All right. Let's get out of here."

~~

Over the course of the month, a few things happened – if Buck wasn't at work, he was either with Eddie and Christopher or with Aras. Aras had been introduced to the team at the 118, and he'd even been invited to Maddie and Chimney's house for dinner. Eddie and Ana were still together, as far as Buck was aware, though Eddie was remaining tight-lipped about it.

And Christopher was even unhappier about everything, not that Eddie had really explained why.

Eddie met Buck outside the gym early one morning, dark circles around his eyes, and said, "I can't do it today, man. I'm exhausted."

"So let's go get some breakfast and talk," Buck suggested. "You could've texted me."

"Yeah, I just… needed to see you in person without anyone else around." Eddie rubbed his face. "It was a long night."

"Let's park our cars at work and grab breakfast at the coffee shop," Buck said. "You can tell me what's going on."

So that's what they did – drove back to work and parked, and walked down the street together to the coffee shop. Buck went in to order for them (he'd memorised Eddie's breakfast order) and then joined him at a table on the footpath. Eddie's head was resting on his hand, his eyes downcast.

"What's going on?" Buck asked him quietly. "Did something happen?"

"It's Chris. He's playing up at school now. He was sent to the principal's office yesterday and I had to go pick him up." Eddie gave him a quick look. "I wanted to call you, but I knew you were at the beach."

Aras had been giving Buck surfing lessons.

"You could've still called me," he said. "I would've come over last night."

"Didn't want to do that to you, man. You were right when you said that we needed to… give each other a bit of space, but… Christopher doesn't understand at all." Eddie bit down on his lower lip, looking anguished. "And this is all my fault because I can't make him happy. He hates that I'm dating Ana. He yelled at me in the car yesterday, and when we got home, he locked himself in his room. I could hear him crying in there, and I just feel like shit."

"I don't want you to think you can't call me," Buck said. "I was home by six; I could've come around."

"But you have a boyfriend now."

"So?"

"So… fuck, I don't even know. I get a phone call from Ana yesterday saying that Christopher… _my_ Christopher told her to go away," he said, swallowing hard. "Like, yelled at her. In class."

"Did you talk to him about it?"

"He wouldn't let me. He locked me out." Eddie shook his head, so damn anguished it made his heart hurt. "I mean, I know… I know teenagers go through stuff, right, but he's nine. He's nine and he's acting like this. Buck, I don't know what to do. What do you think I should do? Should I break it off with her?"

Buck gave him a long look and then asked, "Are you happy?"

Eddie's lips turned down. "No."

"Do you see a future?"

"No."

"Then… I don't know, man. That's your answer."

Eddie gave him a pained look. "I ruined everything," he said quietly.

Concerned, Buck was about to speak, but their coffees arrived. Eddie actually managed to laugh when his was put in front of him – Buck had asked the barista to draw the fire emoji in the foam for him. He added some sugar to his own coffee and then said to Eddie, "Listen – if you're struggling, you need to tell me. I've got your back. I know you haven't been happy; I know you've been taking your anger out on me and I haven't said anything, because… I know something else is going on. But I want to help, so… tell me."

Eddie swallowed hard. "I shouldn't have said yes when she asked me out."

"Okay."

"I was lonely." He looked ashamed, and Buck didn't comment on it.

"I get it," he said simply.

Eddie glanced at him. "I just… didn't think Christopher would react like this. Can you… come over tonight? Talk to him with me?"

"Of course," Buck reassured him. "I was coming around tonight anyway, remember?"

"Pepa and Abuela keep asking where you are," Eddie muttered, stirring his coffee. "Like… like we broke up or something. Fuck."

Buck reached across the table and wrapped a hand around his forearm. "Eddie, just tell me what you want."

"I want to go back in time and not go out with her. If I hadn't done that, you wouldn't have met… the guy, and… everything would be fine," he said, and immediately cringed. "Fuck. I'm awful."

"You don't like Aras."

"I don't know him. I just want you back." Eddie swallowed hard again. "I feel like shit."

Buck rubbed his arm gently and said, "Eddie… I really like him."

Eddie made a face, looking away.

"You'd like him too. He's a nice guy. Really funny. Loves kids, wants kids… you know, kinda what I'm looking for."

Eddie's nostrils flared. His eyes were shiny with tears. "Chim and Hen like him."

"Yeah." Buck slid his hand down Eddie's arm, over his watch strap, and clasped his hand. "But I always have your back. I don't know where this is going to go; it's only been a few weeks."

Eddie nodded. "I know."

"So don't act like I'm dying, all right?" Buck asked, giving his hand a little shake. "Listen – I'll come over tonight; talk to Chris… maybe I can coax it out of him."

"I'm going to break up with Ana," Eddie said decisively. "I'll do it tonight. If you… if you can look after Chris, and talk to him, and I'll… end things."

"Are you sure that's what you want to do?"

"Yep."

"Okay." Buck smiled at him. "We're all good, Eds. We'll figure this out."

~~

"So let me get this straight," Hen said to Buck when they had a moment alone together, re-stocking the ambulance. "Eddie has been acting like the world is ending for the last month because you've got a boyfriend, and Christopher is acting out because… his father has a girlfriend, who is his teacher, who he suddenly hates?"

"That's my understanding." Buck was sitting on the stretcher, passing supplies to her.

Hen gave him a pointed look. "You know Eddie's in love with you."

"Then why doesn't he just tell me?"

She snorted. "Have you met him?"

"Yeah, I'm pretty familiar with the guy." Buck handed her a box of gauze.

"Then you know why." She opened the box, checking the contents, and said, "Would you be up for it, though? If he told you that he wanted more?"

"I never really thought about it… he's always been unavailable."

"But if he wasn't?"

The answer was yes, of course – Buck's stomach was full of butterflies just thinking about it, thinking about Eddie… everything was easy when he was with Eddie and Christopher. Life made sense. They made each other happy; of that he was sure. If he had confidence in one thing in the world, it was that he made Eddie happy. Eddie was never more relaxed and at ease than when it was just the two of them, alone.

He must have had a wistful expression on his face because Hen smiled at him. "You should just tell him."

"And ruin things? Nope."

"Maybe make things better, you don't know."

"Nope. Not when he's like this. He's all twisted up about it… if that's what it is," he clarified. "He needs to get his head together and then we'll talk. And besides that, I like Aras… I kinda want to see where it goes. I'm not dating him just because I can't have Eddie. I wouldn't do that."

"No, I know," she replied, holding her hand out. He passed her another pack of gauze. "But if Eddie comes up to you and tells you what he wants, what are you going to do?"

_Be with Eddie_ , he thought, but shrugged. "I'll have to see. He's not going to do that."

"You don't _know_."

"I know him better than anyone. I can read his mind."

~~

Buck followed Eddie to his house after work, and immediately sprawled out on the floor in the lounge with Christopher, a puzzle spread out between them. Eddie bustled around, getting dressed, and then came out to kneel beside Christopher and give him a kiss on the cheek.

Christopher made a face and pulled away from him – Buck had never seen him do that, ever. Eddie looked wounded.

"Give your dad a kiss," he encouraged, nudging him with his foot. "Come on, kiddo. You're not that big yet."

Christopher acquiesced, and Eddie shot Buck a grateful look. "Okay, I won't be late," he said to them. "This won't take long. What are you having for dinner?"

Buck glanced at Christopher. "What do you feel like?"

"Chicken," Christopher said decisively.

"We're having chicken."

"Save me some." Eddie ruffled Christopher's hair and stood. "Okay, guys. See you soon."

He left, and they were alone. Buck sifted through the puzzle pieces, searching for the edges, when Christopher said in a low voice, "I got in trouble at school."

"Yeah, I know. Your dad told me."

"It wasn't my fault." His lower lip was sticking out in an exaggerated pout.

"What happened?"

Christopher huffed out a breath – he was so much like Eddie when he was upset, with the exact same expressions, Buck thought affectionately. It was no surprise that Eddie was having a hard time dealing with it.

"I have to show you the picture," Christopher said, and slowly got to his feet. "Wait here."

Buck waited, putting pieces together until he returned with his sketchbook. He handed it to Buck, who laid out on top of the puzzle pieces, and waited while Christopher sat down again, his back against the armchair.

"We had to draw a picture of the people who mean the most to us," he began, "and I drew you and Dad."

Buck smiled at him, his heart swelling with love. "Aw, buddy. That's nice."

Christopher nodded. "And then she came over and said that I should draw my grandparents."

"She – Miss Flores?"

He made a face. "And I said no."

"Okay. In a nice way?"

"Yes."

Buck didn't quite believe that, but he nodded. "So then what happened?"

"She told me that family should mean more than friends. I said that you are family." Christopher swallowed hard. "Then she asked if she could talk to me in the hall."

"Did you tell your dad this, buddy?"

"No," Christopher said with a scowl. "He can talk to _her._ "

"Okay. What did she talk to you about in the hall?"

He screwed his face up. "She said that friends are good, but family is the most important thing, that… one day you'll have a family of your own and you won't be in my life anymore."

Buck closed his eyes briefly, shaking his head. He could _kind of_ understand where she was coming from, and she wasn't wrong, but she'd fundamentally underestimated the bond that he, Christopher and Eddie shared. Whether they were in separate relationships or not, his and Eddie's friendship was a lifelong deal. They were meant to find each other - of that he was certain.

He finally said, "Christopher – I think she meant well, but she doesn't know me, and she doesn't know us; she doesn't know that your dad and I are very important to each other. Maybe I'll have a family one day – _maybe_ – but you and your dad will _always_ be in my life. There's not a world where the three of us don't get to spend time with each other, okay?"

Christopher opened the sketch book and flipped through it, shoving it towards Buck. "I drew you as married."

Sure enough, the picture was of Buck and Eddie in matching tuxedos. Buck thought he might cry, he was just so goddamn _touched_. It certainly explained why she hadn't liked it. He ran his fingers over it and said, "Buddy…"

"Men get married."

"I know."

"I want you to be my dad with my dad as well."

He let out a chuckle, nodding. "Yeah, I know."

"Why not?"

"I don't know, kiddo… it doesn't seem like it's going to happen." Buck gazed at him thoughtfully. "Your dad… I love your dad so much. I'd do anything for him. He's the best friend I ever had."

"Why?" Christopher asked.

"I never met anyone like him before in my life," Buck replied. "Your dad can read my mind."

Christopher smiled at him. "He can?"

"Yep. When we're at work, your dad and I only need to look at each other," Buck said, "and we know exactly what we need to do. Your dad has been my partner since the very first day we met."

"And you can read his mind too?"

"Oh yeah, I know exactly what he's thinking. Most of the time he's thinking about you," Buck said, reaching across to tickle him – Christopher let out a squeal and began to giggle. "Your dad makes everyone laugh – he's got a dry sense of humour, bud, do you know what that means?"

Christopher shook his head.

"It means that when he says something funny, he says it in a very normal tone of voice, and it takes people a moment to catch on, but when they do… everyone starts laughing." Buck grinned. "It's like a comedy sneak attack."

"He does that to Carla."

"Yeah, exactly." Buck studied the picture again with a smile and said, "I love you, and I love your dad. I'm not going anywhere. It's okay if your grandparents aren't the most important people in your life. You choose the family you want around you, Chris – if it's your dad and me, your Abuela, Carla… that's okay."

Christopher nodded, chewing on his lower lip. "I miss my mom."

"I know, kiddo. I'm sorry."

"I don't want her to replace my mom, Buck."

He sat up, crawling over the puzzle to sit beside him. Christopher rested his head against his shoulder unhappily. "You know, your dad would never replace your mom," he said, draping an arm around Christopher's shoulders. "Miss Flores isn't a replacement."

"I don't like how she talks to me."

"She's your teacher—"

"She never used to talk this way to me before. I don't want it; I don't want to be in her class. I don't like her. I don't want Dad to be with her." He pressed his face against Buck's shoulder.

"So we'll talk to your dad when he comes home."

"Really?"

"Yes," Buck said firmly, pulling Christopher onto his lap. "Let me tell you something – when you're feeling upset, when something is on your mind and you feel angry and helpless, it's important not to bottle it up. You can talk to your dad or talk to me – we love you, and we will listen to you and try to understand. Your dad and I would never yell or get mad, okay? You're allowed to be upset and angry."

Christopher nodded. "Dad says it's important for us to be honest with each other."

Buck thought, _Yeah, some of the time_ , but he kept his mouth shut. "It is. Your dad is not going to be upset with you." He gave Christopher a hug and then said, "Hey, can I have that picture you drew? I love it."

"You do?" Christopher asked with excitement, reaching for the sketchbook.

"Yeah, I want to put it on my fridge." Buck checked his watch and said, "Hey, we better order some dinner. You said chicken, right?"

He nodded eagerly.

"So let's get us some fried chicken and all the fixins'."

~~

As promised, Eddie was home quickly, less than an hour and a half after he left. Buck and Christopher were dishing out the food in the kitchen when he called out to them from the front door, and then appeared in the doorway.

"Hey," he said, smiling in at them. "I'm not too late?"

"Nope, you're right on time." Buck flashed him a grin.

"I'll just change and wash my hands." He headed down the hallway.

Buck said to Christopher, "I'm just going to go ask your dad something – I'll be right back."

"Okay," Christopher replied, already munching on a chicken leg.

Buck followed Eddie down the hall to his bedroom and found him changing into his sweats. "How'd it go?" He was clad only in his underwear, and Buck allowed himself a moment to rake his eyes over the sleek lines of his body. God, he was _gorgeous_. He quickly averted his eyes, trying to relax, pushing aside the sudden and insistent feeling of _want, need, must have_ in his gut.

Eddie glanced over at him. "Yeah, it's done. It wasn't easy. She cried."

"Oh."

"I told her that Christopher wasn't coping, and I was thinking it'd be better if we went back to being friends, and she said that… she didn't see a future with someone like me anyway." A look of shame crossed his face, and he turned his head away, pulling his sweatpants on.

Buck frowned. "Someone like you."

"Yeah. Like… she said I'm emotionally closed off." Eddie's voice was low. "I guess I am."

"You're cautious; there's a difference."

"Is there? You're the only person I've let into my life."

"That's not true – Carla, Bobby—"

"Nope. You." Eddie pulled a t-shirt on. "I just want things to be easy like they are when it's just you and me."

"But at some point, aren't you going to get lonely?"

He shook his head. "As long as Christopher is happy, I'll be fine."

Buck stepped further into the room, pushing the door shut. "You're allowed to have a life too – if it's not with Ana, then you're allowed to date. You don't have to shut yourself away just because you’re a dad."

Eddie shrugged. "I'm not parading a stream of women through this house. I've tried it; it didn't work, so now… everything will go back the way it was."

"But you're not happy."

"My happiness doesn't matter. His does," he said firmly. "Did you get him to open up?"

"Yeah, a bit. He had a disagreement with Ana about the definition of family. She didn't think that… uh, I should be included in his definition of your family."

Eddie gave him a sharp look. "She said that?"

"Yeah, but I don't think she meant any harm by it. Maybe she didn't understand the situation," he said delicately. "Don't get up her or anything; I think it's a miscommunication."

He frowned. "Okay."

"I reassured him; you'll probably need to talk to him yourself." Buck shrugged. "And… that's it, really. Nothing else going on, as far as I can tell."

Eddie nodded. "That's a relief," he said. "Thanks for talking to him."

"Any time."

"Sometimes I think it's easier for him to talk to you… you're like an independent third party, you know? He trusts you."

"He's my best bud," he said with a shrug. "I'll talk to him any day of the week."

Eddie smiled warmly at him. "Let's go eat," he suggested, "and watch a movie."

"Are you sure that you're okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. I feel good." Eddie clapped a hand on his shoulder, steering him out to the kitchen.

~~

A week later and they were at a house fire in Crenshaw.

The fire was blazing in the downstairs living room, but they had access to the second floor by the internal stairs at the back, so Buck and Eddie were both upstairs, clearing bedrooms. Eddie found a little boy crumpled in the corner and radioed Bobby, picking him up to carry him downstairs.

Buck was behind him on the stairs when the call came through on the radio – "Careful, the basement is alight as well – check where you put your feet."

"Roger that, Cap," Buck replied.

They reached the bottom of the stairs. Eddie had taken two steps towards the back door when there was a cracking sound, and the floor simply dropped away beneath him.

He and the little boy fell about fifteen feet into the basement inferno – flames licked out of the opening, sending Buck stumbling backwards to the stairs. Buck radioed Bobby for help and then leaned over as far as he could – Eddie was shielding the boy with his body, looking around desperately.

So Buck did a stupid thing and jumped into the hole with him.

"No!" Eddie shouted at him, flames crackling around them. "No, Buck!"

Buck just shook his head, grabbing him by the arm and dragging him further away from the heat. He searched around, looking for an external exit and finally spotted windows in the far corner.

"You idiot," Eddie snapped at him, the child clutched to his chest. "Why would you do this? I can get out on my own!"

"Yeah, yeah," Buck replied, searching for something to smash the windows. "I know."

"Then what are you doing?!"

"Eddie, the exit was blocked, on both sides. Where the fuck else was I going to go?"

"Back upstairs!"

"Nope. I go where you go."

Eddie groaned at him, and radioed Bobby. "Cap, we're both in the basement at the windows on the southern side of the house. Filling with smoke; lot of flames."

"On our way," Bobby radioed back. "We'll get you out; just hang on."

Buck found an old shovel and carried it over to the windows, swinging it against the glass, which shattered on impact. He swung it again, taking out the rest, and then climbed up on a ledge. "Going to be a tight squeeze," he called to Eddie. "Pass the kid."

Eddie handed the child over, just as the rest of the team arrived, shining flashlights into the window. Buck passed the kid through to Bobby and then jumped down, gesturing to Eddie. "Go, Eds. Give me your tank."

"Buck," Eddie complained, but let Buck remove his gear. He climbed up onto the ledge, holding his hands out, and Bobby and Chimney pulled him through.

"All right, Buck," Bobby shouted at him, leaning through the opening. "Come on."

Buck ditched his gear as well and climbed up on the ledge, stopping abruptly, turning to look over his shoulder. Flames were creeping up behind him. "Hang on," he called. "I think I hear something."

Eddie and Bobby leaned in through the window, holding their hands out, but Buck jumped down again, searching for the source of the noise.

_Meow?_

_****_


	2. Chapter 2

"Buck, what the fuck are you doing?" Eddie shouted at him, watching as Buck searched around the basement – for what, he had no idea, but Buck was determined.

"Buck, put your gear back on if you're not coming out!" Bobby barked into his radio, but Buck threw his hand up at them and shook his head.

He radioed back, "One more minute!"

"One more minute of smoke inhalation," Chimney said from behind them, and then radioed Buck – "Seriously Buckaroo, if you burn to death down there, your sister is going to kill me."

Suddenly a fat, fluffy ginger cat was thrust out of the window and into Bobby's arms, much to their surprise, and then Buck was holding his hands out as well. Eddie grabbed him, bracing himself with one foot on the wall, and pulled Buck up and through the opening.

Buck scrabbled out and dropped onto his back on the ground, coughing violently before flashing them a grin. "Kitty cat!"

The bastard had nearly died, and he was _grinning._

"For fuck's sake," Chimney snapped at him, but he couldn't keep the smile off his face. "You idiot."

"Not gonna let a kitty burn to death." Buck pulled himself up onto his knees, raising his eyebrows at Eddie. "All good, Eds?"

He nodded and tilted his head towards the ambulance. "Go get checked out."

Buck flashed him a smile, got to his feet, and jogged after Chimney.

Eddie followed the rest of the team around to the front of the house, wiping his face. The child he'd saved was being loaded into an ambulance, a mask over his face, his mother climbing in beside him. Hoses were trained on the house and he was soaked as he passed under the spray, trailing after Hen and Buck.

Someone grabbed his shoulder and he stopped. Hen arched her eyebrows at him and led him out onto the street, away from the rest of the crew, and said, "Hey, you need to tell Buck how you feel."

He froze. "What?" was all he could manage to say, his voice strangled.

"You heard me," she said, as Bobby called out to them. "We can all see it, Eddie. You have to tell him."

"There's nothing—"

"Bullshit." Hen clapped a hand on his shoulder and jogged over to Bobby, leaving Eddie speechless in the middle of the street.

~~

It wasn't until they were back at the station that Eddie pulled Buck aside in the locker room, wrapping his arms around him in a fierce hug. Buck tucked his head against Eddie's shoulder and hugged him back just as tightly.

Eddie whispered in his ear, "Don't you ever, _ever_ , do that again."

"You go, I go."

"That's not how this works."

"Yeah, it is." Buck rocked him back and forth for a few seconds. "Not after the well thing… not going to let anyone talk me out of coming to save you."

"You were lucky," Eddie replied, pulling out of his grasp but wrapping a hand around the back of Buck's neck, pulling his head down so their foreheads were touching. "Don't do it again."

Buck grinned. "Sorry."

"You're not fucking sorry." Eddie gripped the back of his neck, holding him in place. "I would've been able to get out—"

"Yeah, you would've, but… listen to me. Where you go, I go." Buck's voice was low. "We go together."

Eddie pulled away, both hands on Buck's shoulders. "Don't put your life on the line for me."

Buck gazed at him. "Eddie, I would die for you in a heartbeat. You know that."

"Yeah, but—"

"No buts." Buck smiled at him. "Anyway, I'm fine. Everything's fine. You still want to hit the gym in the morning?"

He let out a breath, taking a step back. "That's what you're thinking about?"

"Of course. The gym? 6.30?" Buck waited expectantly.

"Yes, sure. I'll be there."

"Great." Buck checked his watch. "Fuck, I'm going to be late. Say hi to Chris for me, all right? I'm going to the movies with Aras."

Eddie wanted to ask him to blow off his boyfriend and come home with him. He watched Buck disappear into the showers and sat down on the bench heavily – the world's biggest coward, yes.

The door banged open and Chimney strode in, unbuttoning his shirt. "You okay, man? Where's Buckaroo?"

"Showers," Eddie replied glumly.

Chimney raised his eyebrows and said, "Hey… you said to me once that tomorrow isn't promised to anyone, right?"

He looked up at him. "Yeah."

"Maybe take your own advice. You should just tell him, Eddie. The guy he's with… that's only been going on a month. You guys have years of history." Chimney raised his eyebrows at him. "Unless… you're ashamed, or…"

"No, that's not it."

"Then…?"

Eddie shrugged helplessly. "He really likes this guy. I waited too long."

Chimney shook his head. "I really don't you think you did, man. I really think that Buck feels the same way about you. The way he talks about you? He _loves_ you. He loves Christopher. I think… I think you should just tell him, at least. Give him the option. If he says no, well… there's your answer."

"If he says no, doesn't it ruin our friendship?" Eddie thought about what that would mean – no more hang outs, no more adventures together, no more… support system. God, he needed Buck, so much. He'd just never had the courage to be honest with him.

"No," Chimney said. "He's not going to say no."

There was a sudden commotion from outside the locker room, as Hen strode past, a huge smile on her face. "Hi Aras, come on in, no need to be so shy."

"Ah fuck," Eddie muttered, rubbing his forehead. "Fuck."

"Dude, you have to tell him."

"It's too fucking late."

Chimney changed into a fresh shirt and said, "The door is still open, but you're gonna let it slam shut if you go on much longer. Tell him." He clapped Eddie on the back and went outside. "Hey, Aras, good to see you, man. Buck's just in the shower."

They were stopped just outside the locker room. Aras glanced in, and when he noticed Eddie sitting on the bench, he held his hand up in a wave. Eddie wanted to glare at him in response, but he forced a smile and a wave of his own, before rising to his feet.

~~

_Just tell him_ , he thought on the drive to the gym the next morning. _Just tell him. Just tell him. He needs to know. The door will slam shut. He has to know. This can't go on._

Of course, as soon as he pulled up next to Buck's jeep and hopped out of the car, the words died on his lips. Buck was leaning against the back of the car, waiting for him, wearing a tight white tank top and sweats. He flashed Eddie a glorious smile, and Eddie thought, _if you only knew how much I love you._

"Morning, Eds," Buck said easily. "How's Christopher?"

"He's good," he replied. Now that Eddie had broken up with Ana, Christopher was much happier, though he had requested a new teacher. Carla said that he'd get over it eventually, but he'd asked about it every day for a week before Eddie had finally made the enquiry with the school, and had Christopher switched to a different class. Probably for the best.

They went into the gym, and Eddie noticed a fresh hickey on the back of Buck's neck. His stomach turned, and he hated himself all over again.

Once they were in the change room he said to Buck, "Are you okay after yesterday?"

Buck sat down on the bench, lacing up his shoes. "Yeah, but I landed pretty heavily on my bad leg when I dropped into the hole, and it's been giving me trouble."

"How so?" Eddie pulled his shirt over his head and changed into a tank.

"I don't know, like… I pinched a nerve or something. I've had shooting pains up my leg all night."

Eddie was instantly concerned that it might be another blood clot. He went over to Buck and knelt down, reaching to roll up his sweatpants before pausing. "Okay for me to touch?"

"Yeah, sure," Buck replied with a shrug.

Eddie pushed his sweats up his leg and examined it, feeling with his fingers, his eyes on Buck to gauge his reaction. He flinched when his fingers pressed in near his ankle, and Eddie grimaced. "Maybe you should take it easy today."

"It's fine."

"Yeah, but you said that and then coughed up blood." He sat back on his heels, gazing up at him. "You think you twisted your ankle, maybe? Can I take your shoe off?"

Buck shrugged again. "Sure."

Eddie removed his shoe and sock and flexed his ankle back and forth. Buck grimaced and winced a couple of times, and Eddie ran his fingers over the knobbly bone of his ankle and said, "I think you might've sprained it. Maybe. You're walking okay?"

"Yeah, it hurts, but I can walk."

"If the pain gets any worse you should probably get an x-ray." Eddie checked his watch and said, "Listen, it's no fun for me to kick your ass when you're not at a hundred percent."

Buck swiped at him playfully.

"Let's go get some breakfast," he suggested. "You and me."

"You're chickening out because you know I can still win, even when I'm laid up."

Eddie shook his head. "Nah, I'd just rather sit down and talk to you than beat you up today."

"Well, all right, but it's you bowing out and not me."

~~

Eddie noticed Buck did have a limp as they made their way to the coffee shop. He grabbed a table out front while Buck went inside to order for them, and it was as he was sitting there in the early morning sunlight that he thought how strange, but also comforting, it was that his best friend knew exactly what he wanted for breakfast without having to ask. Buck had memorised his coffee order, and he always flirted with the barista to get her to put some artwork in the foam on top.

Maybe it meant that Eddie was boring and predictable, and that was why Buck wasn't in love with him.

Buck returned to the table, sliding in across from him. He leaned in and said confidentially. "So, I have news."

"What news?"

"Maddie let slip the sex of the baby; do you want to know?" Buck was practically gleeful, bouncing in his seat.

"Will Chim kill me if I accidentally say something?"

Buck paused, and then groaned. "Yeah, probably. Damn it."

"It's a girl though, right?" He waited for Buck's reaction, which would be the dead giveaway – and sure enough he lit up like the sun, a huge smile on his face. "Okay, so it's a girl."

"How'd you know?"

He shrugged. "I just… I don't know. I had a feeling."

"Did you think Christopher was going to be a boy as well?"

"Uh…" he thought back. "Yeah, we did – Shannon's mom said that because she was carrying a certain way, it was going to be a boy. And then he was."

"Maybe you're just great at guessing." Buck was smiling at him fondly.

"Maybe." Eddie paused, and then asked hesitantly, "How's Aras?"

"He's great." Buck sat up a little straighter. "We might take a trip next weekend. I've got three days off."

Eddie's heart sank. He had the same time off, and he was hoping… well. Not anymore. "Where to?"

"He wants to go to San Diego." Buck shrugged. "I don't care as long as there's food."

"I have the same time off," he heard himself say, and Buck raised his eyebrows. "I was… going to ask you if you wanted to come camping with us, but… don't worry about it."

Buck looked torn. "Damn it, I really do want to go camping with you guys."

"It's okay, we'll go another time. Not trying to make you choose or anything."

"Well, I choose you and Chris," he said simply. "I'll work it out with Aras. If you want to book us a campsite somewhere, I'll come with you."

"Are you sure?" Eddie wanted to feel guilty, but he really didn't. He kinda felt like he'd won a very small battle for Buck's affections.

"Yeah, of course. Not going to miss out on that." Buck smiled at him. "Hey, Eds… I know you're probably still pissed at me about yesterday, but—"

"No, I'm not, I get it."

"Look, I just… after the well thing, and… I just… if you're going in somewhere, I'm coming with you. That's just how it's gotta be. That was the worst… twenty minutes of my life and I'm not letting it happen again. And I know you're tough, and you don't need me to dive in and save you, but… it makes me feel better to do it, so that's just what I'm going to do. And you just have to deal." He arched his eyebrows and folded his arms across his chest.

_I love you_ , he thought, the words right on the tip of his tongue – and they were almost out of his mouth when their coffees arrived.

Buck flashed a smile at the waitress and passed Eddie's across. They'd drawn a ghost in the foam for him, and Buck was grinning as he sipped from his own cup.

Eddie added some sugar and said quietly, "Well, you have my back, and I have yours, Buck. That's how it works."

"Yep."

"So you'll tell me if that ankle of yours gets any worse."

Buck nodded. "Deal."

~~

Eddie had managed to avoid any real, one-on-one time with Buck and Aras – he'd been introduced to the guy, said hello a few times but other than, that he'd successfully avoided any real interaction with him and he had hoped to keep it that way.

When Aras turned up at the station that night to pick Buck up for a date, Eddie quietly slipped out the side door and went home without saying goodbye to anyone. Christopher and Carla were waiting for him, and he wrapped him up in a hug on the couch as soon as he walked in. Christopher let himself be cuddled, his head on Eddie's shoulder, arms around his neck.

"What's going on?" Carla asked him with concern, one hand on her hip. "Everything okay at work?"

He nodded. "Yeah, fine."

"How's Buckaroo?"

"He's fine as well."

She narrowed her eyes at him, obviously wanting to press him for details, but her phone began to ring. "Damn it. My husband can't do one single thing for himself. I'll have to head out, boys. I'll see you both tomorrow."

"Goodnight Carla," Christopher called to her.

"Goodnight, and thanks for today," Eddie said.

She flashed him a warm smile. "Maybe you call Buck and ask him to come over, to cheer you up."

"Can we?" Christopher asked him, but he shook his head.

"Buck has plans tonight."

A knowing look crossed Carla's face. "Ah," she said. "Well. Maybe you need to talk to him, Eddie."

"Everyone's telling me that." Eddie slumped back against the cushions, still holding Christopher onto his lap. He and Christopher gave each other a long look, and then he said, "Let's go out."

Christopher's face lit up. "Really?"

"Yeah. We'll go out for dinner, what do you say?"

"That sounds awesome."

"Yeah, it does." Eddie planted a kiss on Christopher's head and helped him to the floor. "All right, Carla. I'll see you in the morning before work. Drive safe."

"You two have fun," she said affectionately. "Don't get too wild."

~~

He took Christopher to Dave & Buster's. They went occasionally, usually only for a special occasion, because it wasn't the cheapest night out – but damn it, he needed to not think about Buck, and watching his kid play games would surely help with that.

They ate dinner first, sharing a pizza, and Eddie listened while Christopher told him all about his new classmates and teacher – he was a lot happier than he had been, and Eddie internally kicked himself for disrupting his life so much in the first place.

When Ana had asked him out, he'd been flattered, and he hadn't really thought twice about saying yes. But then Buck had stopped coming over, and Christopher had spiralled, and… whatever initial spark might have been there was rapidly extinguished, as the two most important people in Eddie's life pulled away from him. And then he realised that maybe he'd been shoving down certain feelings for Buck, and not being honest, out of some misguided attempt to lead a "heteronormative life", as Karen put it when he asked her for help.

But Buck had a boyfriend. And everyone seemed to like Buck's boyfriend. They all said he was a great guy; that he and Buck were having a lot of fun together. That they made sense.

It was like a knife to his heart, every single time someone mentioned how fucking wonderful Aras was. How good they looked together. How they _clicked._

He'd missed his chance; that was the truth of it.

After dinner they spent some time in the arcade. Eddie could happily spend hours watching Christopher play games, but he kept an eye on the time – it was a school night, after all – and when he'd had a few wins, they called it a night and headed out to the car.

He was guiding Christopher across the parking lot when he heard Buck call his name. Christopher's head snapped up instantly, and he shouted back, "Buck!"

"Hey!" Buck called from across the lot, jogging over to them with Aras trailing behind. "What are you guys doing here?"

"We just went to Dave & Buster's!" Christopher exclaimed, letting out a shriek when Buck swung him up for a hug, and then carefully lowered him to the ground.

"Aw man, without me?" Buck met Eddie's eyes, looking disappointed. "Don't leave me out next time, okay?"

"Last minute thing," Eddie said, pulling his keys out of his pocket, steadfastly avoiding Aras's eyes. "What are you guys up to?"

"We're just about to see a movie," Buck replied. "You're heading home?"

"Yeah, it's late."

"Who's that?" Christopher asked Buck, peering at Aras with a cautious smile.

"This is Aras," Buck replied. "Aras, this is Christopher – Eddie's son and my best friend."

"Nice to meet you, Christopher," Aras said, bending over to smile at him.

"Aras is my boyfriend," Buck said to Christopher.

Another knife to Eddie's heart. Christopher studied Aras again, and then looked up at Buck, the smile fading from his face. "Oh."

Buck raised his eyebrows. "That okay, buddy?"

Christopher took a step back towards Eddie. "I guess."

_Oh shit._ Eddie met Buck's eyes – there was concern and confusion there. "Come on," he said to Christopher. "You're a bit tired, aren't you buddy? We better get home. I'll see you tomorrow, Buck – and uh, nice to see you again, Aras."

"Okay," Buck said quizzically, his hands on his hips. "I'll come over tomorrow night?"

"We're at Abuela's – you can come if you want. She's cooking." Eddie lifted Christopher up, flashing him a tight smile. "Enjoy the movie."

"'Night," Buck replied unhappily.

Eddie settled Christopher into the backseat of the car and then climbed into the front. As he buckled up, he glanced at Christopher in the rear-view mirror. "You okay?"

Christopher was silent, staring out the window to where Buck and Aras were walking over to the movie theatre, holding hands. "Yep," he finally said, but the scowl on his face told Eddie everything he needed to know.

~~

Eddie tucked Christopher into bed and slid in beside him, reaching for the book on the nightstand. Christopher was still quiet and unhappy, his head on Eddie's shoulder – not looking at the book, but at the photo on the bookshelf. Abuela had taken it of Eddie, Christopher, and Buck at the Christmas party – Buck had a similar framed version in his house as well.

Eddie wanted Christopher to open up to him, but he thought that giving him a little time to process his feelings might be the answer. He was a chapter into the book when Christopher reached out, pushed it down and said, "Why does he have a boyfriend?"

"Well, they met and liked each other, so—"

"No."

Eddie ran his fingers through his hair. "Buck's got his own life, buddy—"

"He should be with us."

"Well—"

"It's not fair."

"Chris, it's not that simple."

"He doesn't love you?" Christopher looked up at him with narrowed eyes.

Eddie thought for a moment, and then said, "We're not in love."

Christopher screwed his face up, rolling onto his side, tucking his hands up against his chest.

"Chris, it's… not easy, you know?"

"I hate this."

"Buck's not going anywhere; he's still my best friend."

Christopher just shook his head, and after a moment Eddie heard him sniffle.

"Hey, buddy," he said, propping himself up on his elbow. "What's going on?"

"I want you to marry him. I want him to be my dad as well."

Eddie was silent, running his fingers through his hair, feeling like the world's worst father. He decided honesty was the best policy and said, "Chris, I love Buck… I made mistakes, you know? I shouldn't have dated Miss Flores."

Christopher turned his head slightly.

"I just… I'm scared of losing Buck, of disappointing you… I know you're not happy right now and I'm not either."

"Just tell him, Dad," Christopher said, shifting so they were facing each other again. "Just tell him."

"I feel bad, kiddo. His boyfriend is a nice guy."

"We'll tell him tomorrow night."

Eddie shook his head. "No, Chris. We can't. I don't want Buck to feel obligated to do anything. I want him to come to me first. Do you understand?"

"Yes," Christopher said quietly.

"And look, even if he doesn't – it's okay. You and I have each other."

"I want you to be happy."

"As long as I've got you, I'm happy. I'm right where I want to be." Eddie planted a kiss to his forehead. "Are we going to keep reading?"

Christopher nodded, cuddling up to him again.

~~

Buck was all over him from the second he climbed out of the car at the station. "Is Christopher okay?"

Eddie grabbed his bag from the backseat and said, "He's fine. He was just taken aback; it's okay."

"He's not mad at me?"

"No, not at all." Eddie clapped a hand on his shoulder, striding over to the building. "Look – he's still getting settled in his new class. Things have been a bit upheaved for the last couple of months but we're getting back into a routine. It's not you – it's never you, Buck. He loves you. Don't worry."

Buck nodded thoughtfully. "Am I still invited tonight?"

"Of course you are. You think Abuela is going to be happy if you don't come over for dinner?" Eddie flashed what he hoped was an easy smile at him, opening the door to the locker room. "Christopher will come around. Don't worry."

"Morning boys," Hen greeted them, tying up her shoes. "Listen – we're going out for drinks and karaoke on Friday. Maddie wants one last night out before the baby comes – and you're both coming. Bring that boyfriend of yours too, Buck."

Eddie made a face that only Hen saw – Buck was stuffing his bag in his locker. Hen gave him a questioning look, but he turned his back on her to change his shirt.

Buck said, "Yeah, that sounds good. I'll let him know."

"And Eddie, are you still dating the teacher?"

"No." He buttoned his shirt as quickly as he could, wanting to escape a line of questioning that was almost inevitable.

He started to the door and was about to flee when Hen said, "That's too bad; I would've liked to have met her."

"Yep." Eddie paused long enough to flash a smile before hustling out of the room. He was not in the mood to have a conversation with anyone about what he should or shouldn't do, but of course Chimney and Bobby were up in the kitchen when he arrived, and Chimney had that annoying smirk on his face that made it clear he was ready to do some shit-stirring.

Eddie shot him a pointed look – _back off_ – and Chimney raised his eyebrows at him innocently. He went to the coffee machine to make a cup, leaning on the counter, checking his phone as Hen and Buck climbed the stairs.

"What I'm saying is that we're going to kick your ass," Buck was boasting. "Aras and I are great at karaoke."

"It's not a competition!"

"It is when Chim and Maddie are there."

"Yeah, I'm the one who'll be doing the ass kicking, Buckaroo," Chimney spoke up. "You and your little boyfriend don't stand a chance."

"He's not that little," Hen said slyly.

Eddie listened to them laugh, stirring his coffee. He barely registered Bobby standing beside him until he murmured, "Eddie, are you all right?"

He glanced at him. "Yep."

"You want to talk about it?"

"No. I'm good." Eddie flashed him a tight-lipped smile and took his coffee over to the lounges, settling down in a seat opposite the television. He was watching the news when Buck dropped into the seat beside him, stretching his long legs out on the coffee table.

It used to be that when they went to events, it was Buck-and-Eddie, but now it was Eddie on his own and Buck-and-Aras. He hated it, and he didn't want to go.

Buck said, "You up for the gym tomorrow?"

"Sure. How's your ankle?"

"Yeah, it's feeling a lot better. I iced it last night."

"Good. No more pain then?"

Buck shook his head. "No, it's okay. Are you sure Christopher is okay?"

"He's fine." Eddie kept his eyes on the TV, ignoring the way Buck kept trying to prompt eye contact.

"You don’t like Aras," Buck said after a moment.

Eddie couldn't help but make a face at that. "I don't know him."

"You could talk to him at the karaoke thing, get to know him—"

"I'm not coming on Friday." Eddie sipped his coffee, trying to focus on the news.

Buck turned towards him fully, a concerned look on his face, glancing over to where the others were talking. "It's a group thing, you have to come."

He shook his head. "I don't have to do anything. I don't feel like it; I'm not going."

"But I'll be there," Buck said helplessly.

"And so will your boyfriend. I have no interest in being the third wheel. I don't want to get to know him. I don't want anything to do with him." Even as the words came out, he realised how harsh they were, and he could see Buck faltering. "I don't want Christopher to have anything to do with him either. I'm glad you're happy, but I don't need to be his friend or introduce him to my son."

" _Eddie_ ," Buck said quietly – hurt, so fucking hurt.

God, he was such an asshole, but he doubled down. "It's your deal. Not mine. You made your choice."

"My choice?"

Eddie shrugged and rose to his feet. "That's it," he said, holding his hands out as if to say, 'we're done.' The others were staring at them, but he ignored their looks and went to rinse his cup out in the sink.

"That's not it," Buck suddenly snapped from behind him, his voice echoing through the station. "You've been such a fucking dick about this. What's your problem?"

"What's my problem?" he asked flatly.

"Yeah! I get a boyfriend and you're what, washing your hands of me?"

"Oh no," Eddie heard Hen murmur.

He shook his head, still washing his cup, refusing to take the bait. "That's not it."

"Then what is it? I know you're not homophobic. So either you have a problem specifically with Aras, or with me dating a guy?"

"I'm not doing this here."

"For fuck's sake!" Buck shouted. "Where else are you going to do it? Will you just fucking talk to me? You're pulling away from me, from everyone – why? Why, Eddie? And Christopher is pissed at me too! What have I done other than find someone to date? And not be your fucking lap dog anymore?"

At that he whirled around. "Hey, friendship is a two-way street," he argued. "You come to my house; I come to yours – we do stuff together. I realise I started dating Ana and you were giving me space, so I'm giving you space! Isn't that what you want? Or do you want me to just turn up unannounced in your apartment to find you fucking your boyfriend? And Christopher isn't pissed off at you! There is other stuff going on; it's not just about you."

"Well, you won't tell me," Buck replied stubbornly.

"He talked to you about it!" Eddie shot back.

"He said his teacher told him that I couldn't be part of his family because we're not related!" Buck snapped. "He was upset. He didn't like her, and then you dumped her anyway so what's the fucking problem? What was I supposed to do? Your kid trusts me!"

"He _trusted_ you." As soon as he said it he regretted it – Buck looked _horrified._

Buck took a step back, shaking his head rapidly. "All because I started seeing someone, and you can't handle it," he said hoarsely. "Hey, Eddie – I don't know what your deal is, but I was single for over a year. Plenty of time, dude. Plenty of fucking time."

"Grow up," Eddie spat, striding over to the stairs. "God, this isn't about you."

"It is! Actually, it is!" Buck shouted after him. "Don't walk away!"

"We're done!" Eddie retorted as he clattered down the stairs. "There's nothing more to talk about, are you happy? Are you happy now?" He cast a look over his shoulder and found that both Bobby and Chimney were pulling Buck away from the stairs, and Hen was descending after him. "Hen, not now."

"Oh, now's a great time," she said, hooking her hand around his arm and dragging him out of the station to the street. "Let's go for a walk so you can cool off."

He was fuming as they strode away from the station and further down the street. She kept her hand locked around his arm, silent until they were far enough away that the station was out of sight, and then she said, "He won't make a move unless you say something first."

"He has a boyfriend. A boyfriend that everyone loves!" he exploded at her. "What do you want me to say? What do you want me to do? Break up the golden couple? We're fighting and we're not even together – what a train wreck that would be!"

"You're only fighting because neither one of you is brave enough to admit what you want," she said. "You're so terrified of destroying your friendship that you're doing it unintentionally. Eddie, Christopher is upset because you're upset – that's why. Kids are perceptive; they know when their parents are unhappy, and you and Christopher only have each other. Christopher will take his anger out on Buck because he knows that he's the person you're upset with."

He looked up at the bright blue sky, shaking his head. "God, I'm just over this," he said. "I was happier before. I should never have put myself out there. I could be single forever."

"Buck can't," she said gently. "He can't, and he won't. You have a kid; he doesn't. He wants kids, a family… someone to come home to. You know that."

"Yeah."

"If it's not you, then you have to let him go and stop making him feel so guilty about it."

His eyes filled with tears. "But I love him, Hen."

She searched his face and said gently, "I know you do."

"I want him."

"I know."

"I didn't realise until it was too late." He wiped a stray tear away, swallowing hard. "It's too late."

She glanced over towards the firehouse and said, "He's not in love with Aras. It's only been a little over a month. You and Buck have years of history."

"I don't want to break them up. And now he probably won't talk to me."

Hen let out a laugh, rubbing his back. "I'll tell you exactly what Buck is doing right now – he'll be standing at the doors waiting for us to come back, fretting, all ready to apologise to you."

"That's optimistic, but I think he's pretty pissed at me." He cleared his throat, wiping his eyes again. "Okay. I'm going to have to go back and grovel to everyone, aren't I?"

She shrugged. "I think it'll be okay."

They walked back to the 118 slowly, and sure enough Buck was waiting near the entrance for them. He and Eddie locked eyes for a few moments before Buck turned his back and walked away.

He glanced at Hen, who had a stricken look on her face. "Yeah," he said. "I told you."

~~

Buck didn't arrive for dinner at Abuela's – not that Eddie expected him to, and he even warned Christopher that Buck wouldn't be able to attend. They didn't text like they normally did before bed either, but when Eddie was reading to Christopher and Christopher asked if he could Facetime with Buck to say goodnight, he placed the call, fully expecting Buck to ignore him.

He surprised him by answering – he was in his loft, alone, looking soft and rumpled. "Hey."

"Hi Buck," Christopher said, taking the phone out of Eddie's hand. "I missed you tonight."

"I missed you too, kiddo. Sorry I couldn't come."

"That's okay. I just wanted to say goodnight."

Buck smiled into the phone. "Goodnight. Hey, we're going camping next weekend, right? Something to look forward to."

"Yeah, awesome," Christopher agreed, smiling up at Eddie. "Can't wait."

"Me either." Eddie took the phone from him and said, "See you in the morning, Buck."

"Yeah, at work," Buck replied quietly. "See you at work."

He nodded and ended the call. _Guess the gym date is off._

~~

The problem with Henrietta Wilson was that if she wanted you to do something you really didn't want to do – for example, attending karaoke – then she pretty much forced you into it, which was how Eddie found himself at a table with Karen, watching Buck and Aras duet on a Bryan Adams song.

He and Buck were not really on speaking terms. Neither had attempted to apologise, and they were both avoiding each other – though Eddie guessed if they were still going to go camping, he was probably going to have to make the first move.

And now he was in a bar watching Aras drape himself over Buck possessively. It was the worst most miserable kind of torture and he hated every single fucking second of it.

Athena slid into a seat at their table, passing a glass of wine to Karen, and remarked, "I don't know what Buck sees in him."

"Me either," Karen agreed, rolling her eyes.

Eddie looked back and forth between them, wondering whether they were serious. What did Buck see in him? A super handsome, charismatic, charming guy who wasn't constantly drowning in his own misery, that's what.

"If you ask me," Athena said confidentially, arching her eyebrows, "he's a player."

"Mmmhmm, I said it to Hen and I'll say it again now, one hundred percent."

Confused, Eddie asked, "What are you talking about?"

"He'll use Buck until he's had his fill and then he'll throw him away, you'll see," Athena said knowingly. "Our Buckaroo is too sweet and nice and trusting."

Eddie couldn't help but glance at Buck again, just as he happened to be looking his way as well – their eyes met, and Buck immediately turned away.

"And when he does get dumped, which we all know he will," Karen said, pointing at Eddie, "that's when you swoop in and make your move."

"Make my move?"

"Oh, come on," Athena said, flicking her hand at him derisively. "Bobby told me what happened the other day. I only wish I'd been there to see it."

"Yeah, the play-by-play Hen gave me was pretty thorough," Karen added. "You two were at each other's throats."

"It was a fight—"

"It was _sexual tension_ ," Karen teased, waggling her eyebrows at him, shimmying her shoulders with her tongue poking out of the corner of her mouth, "and everyone knows it."

"Why do you think Bobby didn't haul your asses into his office and force you to talk it out?" Athena asked. "He was worried you'd start making out."

"Oh my god," Eddie couldn't help but say, horrified, as both women laughed at him.

Buck and Aras finished on stage, bowing to the applause and whistles, giving the finger to Chimney's exaggerated booing. They headed over to the bar together, Aras's hand on Buck's lower back.

Eddie felt sick, but suddenly a full beer was placed on the table in front of him and Josh leaned over his shoulder. "Hi. We don't know each other, but I feel your pain. That's for you."

He looked up at him in shock. "You - huh?"

Josh tilted his head towards Aras and said, "That guy has fucked more men in this town than Kim Kardashian, and that's saying a lot. Hi, I'm Josh. We met at Maddie's baby shower in happier times. I'm going to sit with you guys because you look like fun."

"And you look like you have the intel," Karen replied, pulling a seat out for him. "Sit, sit. What are you talking about?"

Josh sat down, held his hands out and declared, "That guy is one hundred percent on Grindr and I know people who have hooked up with him while he's been dating Buck." When Athena and Karen shared a knowing look, he added, "It's only a matter of time before someone tells Buck."

"I'll go tell him," Athena said fiercely, but Karen yanked her down in her seat. "What?"

"No, Buck needs to figure this out," she hissed. "You can't go over and break them up."

"Is there proof of this?" Athena asked Josh. "Texts?"

"Phone transcripts?" Karen teased, and Athena gave her a withering look.

"I could get screen shots," Josh replied, pulling his phone out. "I'll text my friend."

"Hey, wait," Eddie cut in, before they could get too carried away. "This… is deeply uncool, and he's already pissed at me."

"You're swooping in and saving him like the heroic man you are," Josh said quizzically.

"Right now, he's not going to see it that way. He'll see it as me meddling." Eddie couldn't help but look over at Buck again, who was chatting with Maddie and Bobby. "Where'd the guy go?"

"Bathrooms to hook up, probably," Karen murmured.

Josh raised his eyebrows at Eddie. "Why don't you go in there? See what he does."

Eddie shook his head vigorously. "Oh yeah, I can see that going down well."

"Just go," Karen hissed at him, physically pushing his chair out. "Go. Tell us what happens."

"You three are evil," Eddie hissed back, but then Athena was pushing him out as well. "Seriously?!"

"Seriously, go!" the women said, and against his better judgement, he was cutting through the bar and to the men's toilets, with no idea that Buck's eyes were on him.

He heard muffled laughter coming from the men's bathroom before he opened the door, and hesitated for a second, before pushing it open and stepping inside. Aras was chatting with a guy at the sinks (flirting? He had no idea), and he glanced over at Eddie briefly as he made his way to the urinal.

Eddie nodded at him, unzipping his fly. He did his business, expecting that by the time he turned around Aras would have left, but that was not the case – Aras was still at the sink, drying his hands, his eyes trained on Eddie in the mirror.

He zipped up, stepped over to the sinks and turned a tap on, washing his hands with soap. Aras folded his arms across his chest, tilting his head to the side. "Wow, you really hate me."

Eddie glanced at him in the mirror. "Nope."

"I think you do. I think you hate the fact that I'm dating your boy."

"He's not my boy."

"Nope, he's mine." Aras examined his reflection, and then grinned at Eddie confidently. "He's great in bed. Eager to please."

That was a low blow. Eddie snatched some hand towels and dried his hands. "Good for you."

"Up for anything, you know? He begs for it; someone to touch him, to love him…"

_You motherfucker_ , he thought, but said, "Man, I'm not interested, seriously."

"It'd be pretty perfect if he wasn't so hung up on you." At that Eddie couldn't help but look over at him, and Aras shrugged, leaning on the counter. "I feel like I need to ask you to back off."

Eddie let out a laugh, and said, "Me?"

"Yeah."

"I'm not doing anything."

"You are. You wave that kid around in front of him; making him feel guilty because your kid's disabled or whatever, and then you have fights with him at work, like… it's a lot, and I'm not interested in your problems," Aras said. "You missed your chance; time to let go."

"I missed _my_ chance."

"Yeah."

He nodded once, and then said evenly, "You're nothing. You're just a blip. You don't know Buck the way I do; you have no idea what our relationship is. You don't know that I would die for him in a heartbeat and he would do the same for me. I love him. I love him more than anyone on this planet, aside from my son, and you're nothing."

Aras stared at him, his jaw agape.

"So don't threaten me. Don't talk about my kid. In a year, we won't even remember your name." Eddie turned as the door pushed open fully, and Buck stepped into the room. He froze, horrified, and backed up.

"I heard that," Buck said to them, positioning himself so he was between Eddie and Aras, with his back to Eddie. "This isn't going to work out."

Aras's jaw dropped. "Excuse me?"

"I asked you not to talk about Christopher like that. I don't think that I beg you for anything; in fact, we haven't had sex in a week." Buck folded his arms across his chest. "You're too rough; I told you that. I gave you another chance because most of the time you're a nice guy but after what I just heard, we're done. Absolutely done."

"You can't be serious," Aras demanded. "You'd rather be with _him_?"

"Oh yeah," Buck replied. "I'd be with him every second of the day, if I could. I love him."

Aras rolled his eyes. "I can't believe this. The dude can't even admit that he likes you – what does he possibly have to offer you?"

Buck turned his head slightly, and Eddie heard himself say, "I love you."

A grin appeared on Buck's face. "I know," he replied, and met his eyes. "I know you do." He turned back to Aras and said, "So, that's it. It's been real. Good luck with everything."

"Are you fucking serious?"

"Yep."

Aras gaped at him. "You're such a fucking joke," he said with disgust. "I can't believe I wasted my time with you – at least I can tell people you're a decent lay, even if you're a total loser."

Eddie exhaled sharply, taking a step forward, but Buck threw his arm out and blocked him. "Yeah, I am a great lay," he replied cockily, "and I didn't even give you a hundred percent. I'm going to blow Eddie's mind."

"You fucking prick tease," Aras spat. "Good luck. I can't believe this." With that he shoved past them and stormed out of the bathroom.

Buck turned to Eddie, whose heart was pounding. "That was the greatest fucking speech I've ever heard in my life," he said. "You really feel that way about me?"

He nodded nervously. "You weren't meant to hear it."

"I just wanted you to say something first," Buck whispered, "because I feel like I've been going crazy, wanting you and then you pulling away, and you with her, and me… just wanting you back; wanting your attention… I just always want your attention, Eddie, I just want _you._ "

He let out a breath. "I want you too."

Buck looked around, as if realising they were in the bathroom, and grabbed him by the hand. He dragged him out of the room and into the hallway, pushing him up against the wall, concealed by darkness. "I don't want our first kiss to be in a bathroom," he whispered, and then his lips – those perfectly plump pink lips of his – were kissing him. He tasted like beer but he smelled amazing, and Eddie opened his mouth and surrendered to the one thing he'd never allowed himself to fantasise about.

They kissed for minutes, maybe longer – he lost track of time, totally drunk on Buck, unaware of anything else that was happening around them. It was only when a throat cleared from behind them that he came back to himself – Buck pulled away, turning his head slightly, and Athena said, "So I see you two have made up."

Eddie groaned. Buck called over his shoulder, "Yeah, we're good."

"Happy for you both."

Buck smiled brightly at him, leaning in to brush their lips together again briefly before whispering, "Let's get out of here. My place?"

He nodded, sliding his hands around Buck's neck, unwilling to let him go, even for a second. If they parted, maybe he'd wake up, because surely this was a dream – surely Buck's hands weren't sliding up his sides, surely Buck wasn't pressing their foreheads together, surely Buck wasn't smiling at him like that, surely…

Buck kissed him again, sucking on his lower lip briefly. "Come on," he said against his lips. "Come home with me."

"It's real."

"Yeah, this is real."

"You love me."

"So much."

"I was a dick to you."

"I forgave you almost instantly." Buck's lips brushed his again. "Come on, Eds. I just want to get you alone."

~~

The drive to Buck's apartment was interminable – they took an Uber, and as the driver nattered about the weather and traffic and the possibility of a massive earthquake wiping out LA, but Buck's hand was on Eddie's thigh, the promise of something more. Eddie kept his head turned to him slightly, licking his lips, eyes downcast. Buck was responding to the driver every so often but his eyes were on Eddie, always, unwaveringly.

They walked hand-in-hand up the pathway to Buck's apartment building, and once inside the elevator Buck pushed him up against the wall again and kissed him, open-mouthed, one hand on Eddie's cheek. For someone who always had to be in control, he had no problem letting Buck set the pace – was that trust? He trusted Buck implicitly, it made sense that it would translate to intimacy as well.

The elevator dinged, and Buck dragged him out and into the hallway. This time Eddie got the better of him and forced him up against the wall – Buck laughed, throwing his head back, and Eddie took that as an invitation to suck a bruise on his neck, claiming him. "Mine," he said in Buck's ear.

Buck smiled at him, his eyes bright. "You're beautiful."

Eddie made a face and rolled his eyes. "If you're gonna get all sappy on me—"

"Yeah, I am, and there's not a single fucking thing you can do about it," Buck retorted, dragging him down the hall to his apartment door, fumbling with his keys. "After what you put me through – if I wanna call you beautiful, you're just going to take it."

"After what I put _you_ through—" Eddie's voice cut off when Buck pulled him in for another crushing kiss, stumbling over the threshold into the apartment, slamming the door shut behind them.

And then Buck's hands were tugging his shirt out of his pants, fumbling with his belt, trying to pull his jacket off, and Eddie broke away from the kiss and rid himself of his damn jacket, before grabbing Buck by the shoulders, pressing up against him, opening his mouth for another messy kiss and then… and then Buck's hands were gripping his ass, and they were backing up towards the stairs, and he thought, _holy shit, we're doing this._

He thought he'd be more freaked out.

He thought it would feel weirder, stubble-against-stubble, a strong body up against his instead of the softness and curves of a woman, but he liked it. He liked the way he felt in Buck's arms.

Somehow he ended up sitting on the stairs with his legs spread, Buck on top of him, their lips connected. Eddie clung to him and closed his eyes, cursing himself for all of those wasted opportunities when they could've been doing _this_ instead of literally anything else. Boxing was just an excuse to see Buck all sweaty, away from work – he could forgo that if it meant he'd get to see Buck like this every single day of his life.

Buck pulled away breathlessly, reaching down between them to unbuckle his belt. "What are we doing here, Eds?"

"You need me to explain how sex works?"

"Just making sure we're on the same page, that's all." Buck grinned at him, his cheeks flushed. "I can't believe this. I woke up this morning so pissed at you and now… I've got you on my stairs."

"Yeah, it's not super comfortable for me—"

"But you look absolutely fucking delicious," Buck practically growled, unbuttoning his shirt. "I'm gonna confess something real quick – I've wanted to get my mouth on you pretty much since the first second I saw you."

Eddie managed a laugh. "Oh yeah, you were real subtle about it."

Buck spread his shirt open, let out a breath, and leaned down to press a kiss to the centre of his chest. Eddie twisted a hand in his hair and swallowed hard. "Hey, when you said… you said he was rough, you… are you okay?"

Buck lifted his head, a flicker of confusion crossing his face, before he smiled and said gently, "Yeah, I'm okay. You don't have to worry about that."

"Because I'll go punch him in the face for you."

"Oh, will you?" Buck teased, rising to his knees, pulling his shirt over his head. "I'd like to see that."

"Gotta protect your honour." Eddie tilted his chin up, and Buck's lips were on his again instantly.

Somehow they made it up the stairs and into Buck's bed – Buck's impossibly comfortable bed, with its fluffy blankets and array of pillows that he couldn't help but count, while Buck lay on his side and practically _giggled_ with delight. And then he was sliding on top of him and kissing the smile right off his face, thanking his lucky stars, so goddamn grateful that he'd made that stupid speech in the bathroom and Buck had overheard it.

~~

Eddie awoke to find a sandwich on a plate on his chest, and Buck settling back into bed with two bottles of water and a sandwich of his own. Eddie blinked up at him, grinning when Buck leaned down to press a kiss to his lips.

"Thought you might need the energy boost," Buck said.

Eddie sat up, leaning against him. Buck slipped an arm around his shoulders and rubbed his neck with his thumb. He was starving, and he'd eaten half his sandwich when a thought occurred to him. "Hey… I'm pretty rusty. Was that okay?"

Buck gave him a surprised look. "More than okay."

"You sure?" He'd always felt confident in his abilities before, but that was with women, and this was Buck. It was different.

"Yeah, you were fucking great," Buck said emphatically, leaning in to kiss his cheek. "And you taste amazing, and you're a great kisser—"

"You're not so bad yourself, and you made me a sandwich. What a guy."

"I just figured you deserved a reward for a job well done."

Eddie snorted with laughter, giving Buck a playful push. "All right." They lapsed into silence. Eddie finished his sandwich and guzzled some water, glancing up to find Buck staring into space, worrying away at his lower lip. "What's wrong?"

"I only started dating him because you were with Ana," he admitted. "I would've kept going along with whatever you wanted… I was just thrown. I thought you didn't need me anymore. I was trying to be cool and extremely chilled out about it, but then you lost your mind."

Eddie pressed his face against Buck's shoulder, embarrassed.

"And everyone said you didn't really like her. Why'd you start dating her?"

He sighed, and said against Buck's skin, "The last time I spoke to my parents they… made a big deal about how I only talk about spending time with you, and how… I should be trying to meet someone. And then literally two days after that conversation she asked me out to dinner, and I thought... that must be a sign. She's a nice person, but we didn't click. I just wanted to be with you, and you pulled away."

"We really need to just start talking to each other," Buck murmured. "It would save us a lot of heartache."

"It's almost like communication is important," Eddie teased, and Buck grinned at him, leaning in for a kiss. It was so easy to do that – why had they never done it before? All those nights on the couch together and not once had either of them ever crossed that line. He'd thought about it, once or twice – Buck had soft, kissable lips – but that was all it was. A fleeting thought.

When they parted he settled in against Buck again, his head on his shoulder. How nice it was to be held by someone. How nice it was to not have a gnawing ache in his gut; to be constantly questioning himself. This was right. Everything about _them_ was right.

Buck broke the silence and murmured, "Will Christopher be okay with this?"

Eddie let out a huff of laughter. "Yeah. He told me… he told me he wanted us to get married. He was really upset that you were seeing someone… and that I was seeing someone as well. He's too damn perceptive."

"Maybe we should just listen to him. He seems to have things figured out."

"Yeah, man, he's a _genius._ I keep telling you."

Buck laughed. "I never doubted you. And besides, he told me the same thing. He drew a picture of us getting married."

"He did? He never showed that to me!"

"He tells me his secrets, Ed." Buck slid his fingers through Eddie's hair. "But you have nothing to worry about. Most of his secrets are pretty boring."

"Let me guess – stuff about his cousins?"

"Yeah, and his friends at school. Like, it's cool that Andrew has a toy helicopter but he doesn't need to brag about it _all the time_."

Eddie snickered. "He's a rich kid. Man, you haven't met Andrew? You should see his mom; the very definition of an LA trophy wife. I'll bring you to the next bake sale at school and you can introduce yourself to all the moms. They'd love it. It'll get them off my back."

"They just know that you're the hottest dad around," Buck boasted, smacking a kiss to Eddie's forehead, "and you're all mine. _All mine._ "

"Nah man, I think it's the other way around. You're mine." He paused, and then added, "But mostly you're Christopher's. He claimed you first."

"The kid has good taste."

"He knows a good thing when he sees it." He circled his finger around Buck's belly button and murmured, "I swear to god, he knows me better than I know myself."

"It's because he's a kid, Eds… he doesn't think about the consequences, you know? Like… I know what your parents are like. I know this isn't going to be easy… if it gets to that stage," he added, brushing his lips against Eddie's forehead. "I know you and I love you, no matter what."

Eddie let out a breath, lifting his head to meet his eyes. "I know you and I love you too."

Buck smiled warmly at him. "I got you, Eds. It's you and me now."

"I can't wait."

~~

Eddie and Buck parted at the apartment, only briefly – Buck was headed over to his house to get started on breakfast, while Eddie collected Christopher from his Abuela's. He didn't mention Buck at all, and listened to him chatter about the game he'd played with his cousins and the movie he and Abuela had watched – the original _Wizard of Oz_.

Eddie helped him out of the car and followed him up to the house, holding his bag, and Christopher screamed with glee when Buck threw open the door and held his arms out. "Christopher!"

"Buck!"

"Come in! I've made pancakes!"

"Pancakes!" he shouted, squealing as Buck picked him up in a bear hug and carried him inside, mindful of his crutches.

Eddie followed them, dumping Christopher's bag near the door and kicking his shoes off. Christopher was seated at the kitchen table, his crutches leaning against the wall, a small, individual-sized pancake already in his mouth. Buck flashed him a grin from the stove.

"You found everything okay?" he asked, leaning against the doorframe.

"I was shocked to find everything I needed, yeah." Buck carefully added three pancakes to a plate and passed it to him. "Blueberries for you, Eds, and chocolate chips for me and the little man over here."

Christopher was looking back and forth between them, his eyebrows knitted together. "What happened?" he asked with confusion; a smear of chocolate on the corner of his mouth. "You're happy again."

Eddie glanced at Buck, and then said, "Buck and I made up, and we're going to be boyfriends now."

Christopher's jaw dropped. He began to nod, slowly at first, but then enthusiastically, and said, "Okay!"

"Okay," Buck repeated, flashing him a grin. "He's on board with it."

"Go sit at the table, kiddo," Eddie said, ruffling his hair. "Buck and I are all good."

"I'm so happy," Christopher said as he went to the table. "Really happy."

"So are we," Buck replied, pausing in the doorway to press a soft kiss to Eddie's lips, before striding out to join Christopher. "Now tell me every single little thing I've missed in the last few weeks, sparing absolutely no details at all."

~~

The problem was that the whole team already _knew_ – Maddie called Buck and squealed so loudly over the phone that Eddie heard it clearly, and then he received a phone call from Karen and had to endure a solid fifteen minutes of her and Hen gloating down the line that they were somehow responsible for him and Buck figuring things out.

At the start of their next shift, Bobby called them into his office, smirking, and asked them to sign a form. Eddie thought he might've put up more of a fight about it, but he merely congratulated them and sent them on their way.

Chimney was the one who pulled them both aside and gave them both hugs – "Impending fatherhood got you feeling sentimental, Chim?" Buck had asked, totally baffled – and when Athena arrived later in the day, she merely winked at them. Half an hour later, Eddie saw her give Buck a kiss on the cheek.

So the team had been worried, he guessed, but they all seemed to be cool with it. Buck was back at his side where he belonged, as though nothing had changed, but every so often their hands would touch and he'd feel a little shiver of anticipation, or he'd catch Buck gazing at him from across the room… and he had to fight every single instinct telling him to drag Buck down to the showers for some alone time.

He managed to hold out until after the shift, and it was when they were in his truck that they were pawing at each other, kissing desperately, and when someone rapped on the window he barely noticed until he heard Chimney shout, "Hey, public indecency is a crime, you know."

Buck pulled away long enough to give him the finger.

~~

Buck found them a decent camping spot just outside of the city, and they set up the tent before sitting around the campfire to roast marshmallows and make s'mores, much to Christopher's delight. Eddie sat back and let Buck entertain Christopher with made-up monster stories that made him shriek and giggle, and it was late when his eyelids began to droop. Eddie helped him into the tent and tucked him into his sleeping bag, returning to take a seat at Buck's side.

"Hey," Buck said to him, reaching out to run his fingers through Eddie's hair. "Good day?"

"Yep. Great day." He smiled up at him lazily.

"Tomorrow we'll go fishing."

"Do you even know how to fish?"

"I'm a master of many things." Buck added two more marshmallows to his skewer and held them over the fire. Eddie leaned in and pressed a kiss to his neck. "You know this is the only thing I'll ever want," he murmured. "You and Chris."

"You're all we want, too."

"Good." Buck gave him a satisfied smile. "I think about that little speech of yours all the time."

He groaned. "Stop it."

" _In a year, we won't even remember your name._ Damn, Diaz."

"Shut up," he grumbled.

"As long as I live, I will never forget that speech." Buck retracted the skewer from the fire and blew on the marshmallows to cool them down, before sliding one off and passing it to Eddie. "Hey, we should go out on a real date when we get back to town."

Eddie made a face. "Why?"

"So I can wine and dine you, show you off," Buck said with a grin. "Get you all nice and loose. Maybe take you dancing."

"You wouldn't be able to keep up," he said without thinking.

Buck's eyes lit up. "And why is that?" he asked, popping the marshmallow into his mouth.

He'd said too much, and turned away, shaking his head. "No reason."

"No, tell me."

"Nope." He pulled his marshmallow apart, popping one half in his mouth, and chuckled when Buck nuzzled against his neck. "No."

"I'll get the truth out of you."

Eddie turned his head slightly and murmured, "If you're lucky."

"That's a challenge. A direct challenge."

"We'll just have to see."

~~

Three weeks later, Buck found out that Eddie had taken dance lessons when he was a kid, and was painfully shy about it at as an adult.

A month after that, he convinced Eddie to come dancing with him at a club where they would know no one. It was by far the single hottest night of Buck's life – coupled with the fact that it was genuinely steamy in LA – and when they made their way back to Buck's apartment, he'd practically ripped Eddie out of his clothes and carried him up the stairs.

Three months after that they ran into Ana Flores and her new boyfriend out on the town, and she'd given Eddie a knowing look.

Two months later, Buck and Eddie accidentally got drunk at Chimney's birthday party and the whole team found out that Eddie could really cut a rug when he wanted to, but the night ended with them both on the floor in Buck's bathroom, sick as dogs, and Eddie swore when Hen sent him a video of them dancing to a Ricky Martin song.

A month after that, Eddie asked Buck to move in.

Six months later, Buck received a text from Aras, out of the blue – _Hey, it's Aras, I'm back in town – I know things ended weirdly, wondered if you were single and wanted to catch up?_

Buck replied, J _ust got engaged. Hope you're well._

Eddie looked up from his book. "Who was that?"

Buck blocked Aras's number, leaned in to kiss him and said, "No one."

-the end-

**Author's Note:**

> Find me @ Tumblr: [woodchoc-magnum](https://woodchoc-magnum.tumblr.com/)
> 
> [Paul McCartney & Wings - Let Me Roll It](https://youtu.be/kWFehaQEMYI)


End file.
